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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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BosLeg4ev

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Today, the girl my boyfriend cheated on me with posted pics of them kissing on Facebook, and tagged me in them. FML

#17934010 (315)

I agree, your life sucks (18377) - you deserved it (1070)

On 10/08/2011 at 9:04am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my 4 year old asked to go outside and play in the sprinkler. I told him not right now because I was busy and he's too little to play outside by himself. I came out of the laundry room later to find he'd brought the sprinkler in the house and turned the water on. At least he listened. FML

#17528012 (204)

I agree, your life sucks (21524) - you deserved it (5337)

On 08/20/2011 at 10:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend sexted me for the first time in months. Half way through reading it I was getting kind of hot. Then I found a spelling mistake and all I could think to do was correct her. She won't talk to me. FML

#17525503 (305)

I agree, your life sucks (7608) - you deserved it (47709)

On 08/20/2011 at 12:58am - intimacy - by KiDCuSHi - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a flat tire in the middle of nowhere. I called AAA, and they said it would take 2 hours to get there. They called 2 hours later saying they got a flat tire and would be there in another 2 hours. FML

#17499857 (231)

I agree, your life sucks (29290) - you deserved it (1848)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML

#17381048 (168)

I agree, your life sucks (20105) - you deserved it (2260)

On 08/05/2011 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by moonstone15 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML

#17182524 (257)

I agree, your life sucks (25702) - you deserved it (5105)

On 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by gntfmlingnow - United States (Ohio)

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393 (145)

I agree, your life sucks (13009) - you deserved it (854)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was asked to crawl through a sun roof because one of my co workers locked her keys in her car. After I got the keys, instead of opening the car door, I climbed back out through the sun roof. To laughter. FML

#13024683 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (4194) - you deserved it (24981)

On 09/12/2010 at 8:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to confront my boyfriend after finding a girl's phone number next to my bed. He said I was over reacting. When I told him it was over, he asked for the number back so he could call her. FML

#12748715 (81)

I agree, your life sucks (21341) - you deserved it (5800)

On 08/26/2010 at 12:11am - love - by tj - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495 (282)

I agree, your life sucks (32428) - you deserved it (8888)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, an elderly lady swore at me for not holding a door open for her. The door in question was automatic. FML

#8800803 (121)

I agree, your life sucks (17490) - you deserved it (1312)

On 03/03/2010 at 3:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, I went on a date with a great vegan guy in my class. We went to a vegi-restaurant, I dutifully ate all the meatless dishes, but he seemed pissed about something, and other diners kept giving me angry looks. After we left, I realised I'd worn my leather jacket to the date. FML

#8634063 (201)

I agree, your life sucks (7579) - you deserved it (25053)

On 02/25/2010 at 4:42am - love - by OmniVore (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I decided to apply for a credit card to help build up my credit rating. It seemed smart since I'm a 24 year old college graduate. I was rejected for not having a credit history. Being rejected turns out to hurt your credit history. The irony of my predicament is too great for words. FML

#8615441 (160)

I agree, your life sucks (20082) - you deserved it (1523)

On 02/24/2010 at 2:13pm - money - by creditwhore (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

#8193148 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (10939) - you deserved it (4366)

On 02/13/2010 at 1:51am - intimacy - by whathef???? - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a white guy tried to teach me to use chopsticks properly. I'm Chinese and have been using them since I could eat. FML

#8074881 (177)

I agree, your life sucks (21443) - you deserved it (3102)

On 02/10/2010 at 12:11am - love - by black_commet08 - Sent from mobile version