Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BorgQueen

Search for a member

BorgQueen

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 843
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

BorgQueen's page activity

Visits<b>Sliver1991</b> - the 08/10/2012 at 2:22pm<b>EconomicCrisis</b> - the 02/23/2012 at 2:13am<b>bryan788</b> - the 01/04/2012 at 6:24am<b>bernielove89</b> - the 01/03/2012 at 7:50pm

BorgQueen's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of BorgQueen's badges

BorgQueen's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting a bit steamy. After a few minutes, he jumps up and runs over to the closet and puts on a long brown jacket putting the hood over to his eyes. He looks me in the eyes and says 'I am Obi Wan Kenobi and I'm going to slay you with my light saber'. FML

#4223881
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46214) - you deserved it (8934)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:17am - misc - by dam01 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

#4201087
399 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63937) - you deserved it (14553)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me that we would be living out one of his fantasies. When I showed up, ready to go, he began playing the theme song to Star Trek and asked me to call him Mr. Spock. FML

#4095449
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40951) - you deserved it (7060)

On 07/28/2009 at 12:15am - intimacy - by saynotochrispine (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokémon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokémon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

#3971030
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15804) - you deserved it (66121)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by MitchFail (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me because "god told him to." What god didn't tell him was that I would check his e-mail and find all the e-mails to and from his new girlfriend. FML

#3797980
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43876) - you deserved it (5419)

On 07/16/2009 at 9:44am - love - by hrtbrkn (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML

#3711192
379 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17836) - you deserved it (77259)

On 07/13/2009 at 5:17am - intimacy - by air (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me at the zoo. With a Ring Pop. He was serious. FML

#3470108
421 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61289) - you deserved it (11789)

On 07/04/2009 at 12:49am - love - by Cococautly (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was chatting with an amazing guy online. He was perfect for me. After five hours he told me he loved me and I said it back. So than we decided to trade nudes. I sent mine. Within two seconds my niece calls, laughing her ass off, telling me how weird my birthmark is. FML

#3442749
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12047) - you deserved it (92460)

On 07/03/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Uriah (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to announce to my son that I am pregnant again. After I told him, he looks up and yells: "fuck this shit!" and walks out of the room. My son is nine years old. FML

#3261545
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60988) - you deserved it (25467)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:05am - kids - by poormom (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up from a dream about finding a vending machine that gave me free food. I kept eating, it was so satisfying words could not describe how great it felt. Then I realized my hands were in between my legs, I had been touching myself dreaming about free food from a vending machine. FML

#2801625
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64904) - you deserved it (14356)

On 06/11/2009 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by hdat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was walking down the sidewalk and heard a little girl ask her dad why I had blue hair. He said, "Sometimes drugs will make people do stupid things." FML

#2485875
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38528) - you deserved it (35313)

On 05/31/2009 at 11:12pm - misc - by bluehairedfreakgirl (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, the girl I like came over to my house to watch a movie. We had seen pretty much every movie that I suggested, so we ended up watching The Lion King. I forgot how sad that movie is, because once Mufasa died I started bawling my eyes out. FML

#2456065
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37646) - you deserved it (22895)

On 05/31/2009 at 2:46am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

#2275729
726 comments

I agree, your life sucks (259698) - you deserved it (117058)

On 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm - love - by Angelofkarma (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

#2182938
387 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80557) - you deserved it (9844)

On 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm - intimacy - by herve (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: