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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Boob

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Boob
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4970
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Boob's favorite FMLs

Today, my house was raided for drugs. I had to find out my father is a drug dealer. The cops then told me this wasn't their first time here, but it was the first time I was home to see it. They said it was nice to finally meet me. FML

#17375446 (129)

I agree, your life sucks (37633) - you deserved it (1539)

On 08/05/2011 at 4:41am - misc - by thehumanshield - United States (California)

Today, my roommate demanded that I dance naked for him as a birthday present. When I declined, he offered to pay me. When I declined again, he stormed off to pout in his room and played really loud depressing music. We're both guys and I have 11 months left on my lease with him. FML

#17373472 (189)

I agree, your life sucks (30863) - you deserved it (2065)

On 08/05/2011 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Creeped_out_n_stuck (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my friend's dad had a heart attack. Without realizing what I was saying, I texted her, "If you need anything, you know I'll be there in a heartbeat." FML

#17373083 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (18969) - you deserved it (7930)

On 08/05/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom was screaming at me and said, "I wish I'd never adopted you." I guess I'm adopted then. FML

#17371969 (202)

I agree, your life sucks (42439) - you deserved it (1710)

On 08/04/2011 at 10:45pm - misc - by Thebestman123 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I realized burying my dog underneath our swing-set was a bad idea. My two sons are now scarred for life. FML

#17364695 (154)

I agree, your life sucks (2382) - you deserved it (12706)

On 08/04/2011 at 6:19am - kids - by Bobsaget00 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

#17362826 (207)

I agree, your life sucks (35111) - you deserved it (2012)

On 08/04/2011 at 1:44am - animals - by SydIsPrettyCool - United States (Michigan)

Today, while stuck in traffic on the highway, my 5 year old in the back seat asked me why the man in the car next to us was pulling on the other man's "peepee". FML

#17361677 (204)

I agree, your life sucks (12866) - you deserved it (736)

On 08/04/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by whatnot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML

#17359587 (215)

I agree, your life sucks (30260) - you deserved it (2514)

On 08/03/2011 at 9:19pm - animals - by roze198765 - United States

Today, I got an anonymous letter, stating my condo's community and all my neighbors can hear me having sex. Not only that, but kids gather around my window to listen. FML

#17354061 (182)

I agree, your life sucks (4418) - you deserved it (7657)

On 08/03/2011 at 10:33am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. And now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML

#17349963 (456)

I agree, your life sucks (16766) - you deserved it (993)

On 08/03/2011 at 12:04am - misc - by soccerbuddyz - United States (Florida)

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

#17338982 (405)

I agree, your life sucks (32864) - you deserved it (9558)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:58am - kids - by ohcrap - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 17 year old asked me whether to chew or swallow grapes. I raised this dumbass. FML

#17302566 (304)

I agree, your life sucks (21412) - you deserved it (11988)

On 07/29/2011 at 10:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I learned that my daughter's gerbils are not afraid of the vacuum cleaner. FML

#17279585 (118)

I agree, your life sucks (20015) - you deserved it (6937)

On 07/27/2011 at 2:09pm - kids - by corasmom (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday. I now know how my sister is paying for her new car. FML

#17233282 (377)

I agree, your life sucks (42617) - you deserved it (4386)

On 07/23/2011 at 8:09pm - misc - by assante2010 - United States (Maine)

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to meet the girl he has been cheating on me with. He thinks it makes the cheating more understandable if I see how 'hot' she is. FML

#17165263 (397)

I agree, your life sucks (48407) - you deserved it (3919)

On 07/18/2011 at 4:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)