About BodyCountEndless : Why do I have so many visits?
BodyCountEndless's FML badges
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
BodyCountEndless's favorite FMLs
Today, I went running. I live in a small town and people know me fairly well. It was dark when I went to avoid the heat. I was almost finished with my run when the cop comes up and asks me what I'm running from. Clearly being fat and out of shape is not a good enough alibi. FML
by Anonymous / 03/11/2015 at 9:50pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Health
Today, after 4 years of nicely asking, I wrote an official memo to our logistics department, asking for new chairs for my subordinates. The logistics people came and concluded that there are more broken chairs than good ones, but suggested that perhaps we should all go on a diet. FML
by Matei / 03/11/2015 at 8:36pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Work
Today, I ate an apple. My sister then walks in dressed as a witch, and asks, "Have you seen my poisoned apple?" She was playing at Snow White, and the apple had been dipped in the toilet, the cat's food bowl and the garbage can. FML
by dorianseiji / 03/11/2015 at 4:37pm / France (Picardie) / Kids
Today, I was given a new responsibility at the law firm where I work. I'm now in charge of punching holes in every single piece of paper to be found in the office, estimated to be in the hundred-thousands. The reason? I finish my daily clerical work too quickly. FML
by KillMePlease / 03/11/2015 at 4:15pm / United States (New York) / Work
Today, I finally accepted I need help with my anxiety issues. I started small and I joined a support forum and wrote a post. I was quickly called a troll by multiple users, accused of faking it, and told to "fuck off back to Tumblr" because they wouldn't believe my anxiety is really so serious. FML
by Anonymous / 03/11/2015 at 2:43pm / United States / Health
Today, I got in line for my flight to visit a friend in England. My mom was there to see me off, and decided to shout "No sex!" while waving, in front of at least a hundred people who will very likely be sharing the transatlantic flight with me. FML
by Anonymous / 03/11/2015 at 11:26am / United States / Miscellaneous
by nothesisforme / 03/11/2015 at 10:01am / France / Work
by birdisnottheword / 03/11/2015 at 9:55am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by CasaDeLoser / 03/11/2015 at 1:32am / United States (Washington) / Kids
by Blonde / 03/10/2015 at 11:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Geek
Today, I thought the ring my boyfriend bought for me had fallen off while emptying the trash into the bin. After panicking and emptying a week's worth of rubbish onto the ground, I found my ring safe and sound. On my other hand. FML
by MyPrecious... / 03/10/2015 at 8:33pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, while discussing my grades with my mother, she told me that when she was my age she was dumb but hardworking, and my dad was lazy but very smart. She then added, "You managed to get the worst out of each of us." FML
by Daughter of the year / 03/10/2015 at 8:19pm / Brazil (Rio de Janeiro) / Miscellaneous
Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML
by Anonymous / 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by katgib13 / 03/10/2015 at 6:38pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous