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BodyCountEndless

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BodyCountEndless

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  • Number of visits : 8978
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

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BodyCountEndless's favorite FMLs

Today, while finally about to make love with my long term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML

#21249014
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45277) - you deserved it (4515)

On 08/31/2014 at 11:14am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend was entertaining himself by shoving tampons up his nose and seeing how far across the bed he could blow them. This man is the father of my son. FML

#21248639
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35240) - you deserved it (8722)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:11pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I woke up to the sight of a dead fly on my bedside table, being eaten by a swarm of ants. I screamed so bad that my dad said he thought my sister was being murdered in my room. FML

#21248448
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32370) - you deserved it (5747)

On 08/30/2014 at 12:40pm - misc - by liilii (man) - India (Kerala)

Today, I saw a customer wandering around, looking confused. I went over and kindly asked if I could help him find anything. He said no, but that he'd help me find the teeth he'd knock out of my mouth if I didn't get lost. FML

#21248418
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34377) - you deserved it (2743)

On 08/30/2014 at 11:14am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40966) - you deserved it (9499)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I was called in over speakers at the airport. The man who was speaking clearly and nearly burst out laughing when he said my name. Soon, a few people around also snickered when they heard it. I had to wait five minutes before I could casually stand up. My last name is Bastard. FML

#21248318
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41371) - you deserved it (3216)

On 08/30/2014 at 4:35am - misc - by poorbastard (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my little sister was using my phone to play games. About an hour later, she came to me and said my phone wouldn't work. Turns out my phone had gotten hot and she put it in water to cool it down. FML

#21247999
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37691) - you deserved it (4365)

On 08/29/2014 at 5:22pm - kids - by Quincy_Ethan - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML

#21247953
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44407) - you deserved it (6596)

On 08/29/2014 at 4:15pm - intimacy - by SCARRED (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, it was my great aunt's funeral. We all had to wait two hours for the service to begin, because they forgot to dig the grave. FML

#21247920
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37654) - you deserved it (2243)

On 08/29/2014 at 2:54pm - misc - by abbshows (man) - United States

Today, my parents sat me down and told me that I'm adopted. I took it in stride, and reassured them that as far as I'm concerned, they're my true parents. That annoyed them. Apparently the whole thing was a prank for a YouTube video, which I ruined by not crying or freaking out. FML

#21247893
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45384) - you deserved it (2787)

On 08/29/2014 at 2:09pm - kids - by hannahka (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after finally getting rid of an extremely rude, abusive customer, I muttered that I could kill people like her. I didn't know my manager had heard me, until a pair of police officers arrived. He'd reported me for "threatening to murder a customer". FML

#21247836
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36206) - you deserved it (9418)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:17pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Slough)

Today, it's been three weeks since my dad finished growing what he calls a "Jesus beard" and gone out asking for donations and claiming to be Jesus Christ. I've been trying and failing to get a job for 2 years, and he's already raking in cash from gullible idiots. FML

#21247834
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36284) - you deserved it (3209)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother told my 3 year old son that cool kids call their parents by their real names. This wouldn't be half as bad if he hadn't also convinced my son that my real name was Satan. FML

#21247749
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40486) - you deserved it (3822)

On 08/29/2014 at 8:35am - kids - by Amithatevil - Japan (Kanagawa)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37370) - you deserved it (5010)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, my butt decided to delete the 650 photos I had on my phone. FML

#21247514
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36290) - you deserved it (7407)

On 08/28/2014 at 10:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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