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Blueocean7

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Blueocean7
  • Town/Country : Washington DC, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2020
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Blueocean7's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML

#18200253
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48692) - you deserved it (6225)

On 11/09/2011 at 7:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up soaked in water. It seems at some point in the middle of the night, I woke up thirsty and opened the water bottle I keep on my nightstand. I managed to drink a little, but it seems I didn't manage to put the cap back on before losing consciousness again. FML

#18184831
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19938) - you deserved it (5004)

On 11/07/2011 at 3:49pm - misc - by Olorin (man) - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)

Today, I was attending my bachelor party. I watched a very attractive young girl dancing on a pole, giving me a seductive look. As she walked up to me, I realized it was my soon-to-be wife's younger sister. FML

#18170655
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24704) - you deserved it (15027)

On 11/06/2011 at 1:15am - misc - by wellthisisawkward80 - United States

Today, I had to cancel my birthday party because of snow. It's October. FML

#18104426
338 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23170) - you deserved it (3456)

On 10/29/2011 at 3:46pm - misc - by bethanygirl - United States

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46809) - you deserved it (14935)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, for our 3rd anniversary, I gave my boyfriend a watch, courtesy of Rolex. He gave me herpes, courtesy of his other girlfriend. FML

#18014393
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48186) - you deserved it (4389)

On 10/18/2011 at 10:16am - health - by stdpositivenow (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while at work being a waitress, this lady came in and requested to sit in the section I was waitressing. She held up a $100 bill and told me that if I was attentive to her needs, she would leave me a $100 tip. Excited, I waited on her hand and foot. She dined and dashed. FML

#17894679
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38040) - you deserved it (4764)

On 10/03/2011 at 9:05am - work - by moodyreallyrocks - United States (Kentucky)

Today, a man punched me for sleeping with his wife. Bewildered, I insisted I would never sleep with a married woman, to which he retorted "She wasn't my wife when it HAPPENED, dumbass!" I was assaulted for sleeping with my own girlfriend three years ago. FML

#17848518
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41004) - you deserved it (3192)

On 09/27/2011 at 3:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

#17839569
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18837) - you deserved it (42229)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)

Today, I bought a UV light so I could detect cat pee, since I was sure my cat was relieving herself on the carpet. I decided to try it out in the living room first. Nearly half the room lit up like a Christmas tree. FML

#17829441
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24899) - you deserved it (3440)

On 09/25/2011 at 12:15pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that the double spacing format in an essay refers to the space between each line, not the words. I've been pressing the space bar twice between each word all through high school and halfway through college. FML

#17821676
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11250) - you deserved it (72229)

On 09/24/2011 at 2:47pm - misc - by essay2 - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend said I looked like ET and made me pose next to a full scale model of him while she took a picture. She's showing her friends the picture and they agree. FML

#17795407
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22409) - you deserved it (2697)

On 09/21/2011 at 12:42pm - love - by srloin (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend cheated on me. But he justified it by saying she was a ginger. FML

#17738914
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27914) - you deserved it (3697)

On 09/13/2011 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I learned that I have the balls to base jump and skydive, but I still can't ask out the hot girl working at the pub. FML

#17620224
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20083) - you deserved it (7369)

On 08/30/2011 at 10:12am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I realized the closest thing I have to a love life is organizing my porn folder by category. FML

#17618254
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12880) - you deserved it (26647)

On 08/30/2011 at 1:20am - intimacy - by WithoutLove (man) - United States



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Thursday 10 April 2014

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