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Blueocean7's FML badges
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Blueocean7's favorite FMLs
by Anon / 12/11/2014 at 1:13pm / Ireland (Cork) / Intimacy
Today, I was watching The Walking Dead while in bed, when I heard a noise in the kitchen. I told myself I was just imagining things. Several hours later, as I was getting ready for sleep, I found out I'd actually been robbed. FML
by Slow_Walker / 11/15/2014 at 5:59pm / Georgia (Dushet'is Raioni) / Intimacy
by datgurllllukno / 10/15/2014 at 2:26am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/14/2014 at 2:57pm / United States (Florida) / Love
Today, it's the first day of fall. It's also the day that over 20 people have made jokes about my name being "Autumn" like they're the funniest, most original people alive. It's not even 8 am. This is going to be a long day. FML
by Anonymous / 09/23/2014 at 8:00am / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, in college, we were asked at what age girls tend to become physically attractive. Wrongly thinking the answer was in relation to puberty, I said "Umm... 11 or 12?" Now everyone thinks I'm some kind of pedophile. FML
by Anonymous / 09/16/2014 at 2:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML
by SadAndDeaf / 09/02/2014 at 7:38pm / Miscellaneous
Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML
by humdrummitydrum / 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm / United States / Health
by Hopeless romantic / 08/16/2014 at 2:20am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love
Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML
by dypshyyt / 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm / United States (Florida) / Health
by Anonymous / 07/22/2014 at 1:39pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend, because he's too manipulative. By the time our chat ended, instead of being single, I'm somehow now committed to going on vacation with him and his family. FML
by whatjusthappened / 07/21/2014 at 11:58am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
by weeping_angel_ / 07/12/2014 at 10:00am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by boob sisters / 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
Today, I collected a package from a handsome UPS guy. We exchanged smiles, and he even noticeably checked me out. I was feeling really confident for the first time in a while. Then I went inside and saw that I had two huge breastmilk spots on my chest. FML
by BBeffedmylife / 06/14/2014 at 10:18am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I found out the unionized cleaning people that empty the garbage and clean the toilets make… Today, since I'm too ashamed to go buy a proper sex toy, I used an old Star Wars toy sword instead.… Today, after years of waiting, I finally got to meet the band whose music got me through one of the…
- Today, I’m a babysitter for a 4 year-old little girl. All afternoon, I attended Barbie’s murder and… Today, I told my son off because he lost a form. A form that I later found in my right-hand pocket.… Today, I’m in Rome for Halloween. I went out with few friends and spent the night with a man. The…