Blueocean7

Search for a member

Offline (4 hours ago)

Blueocean7

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7156
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

Blueocean7's page activity

Visits<b>cocainewhore</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 11:50am<b>flyingflies</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 11:59pm<b>asiansapphire</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 11:21pm<b>fml0505</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 5:40am<b>ManUtdFan743</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 9:46pm<b>GeorgiaBea</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 8:33am<b>team_hale</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 8:29pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 7:42pm<b>AFaye3964</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 11:41am<b>Infamous278</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:53am<b>ChelzTheWolfGirl</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 5:00am<b>ohcheriecherie</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 11:45pm<b>piepiepiepiepie</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 3:35pm<b>lexiieeex3</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 1:53am<b>wildcats909</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 11:43am<b>rob02</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 12:46am<b>chouter21</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 1:04am<b>mia_marie01</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 12:00am

Blueocean7's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of Blueocean7's badges

Blueocean7's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at Aéropostale with some friends when I noticed a woman glaring at me. When we got to the checkout, the woman still had her eyes on me, so I asked why she was staring. She snapped, "If you had kept your legs closed, you wouldn't be pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML

by vlcardenx3 / 03/12/2011 at 4:11pm / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I lost my cat. It's deaf, so no matter what I do it can't hear me. FML

by blahhlovely_30 / 03/09/2011 at 3:03pm / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, while at Subway, I looked on as an employee killed a fly with his hands. He then continued working without a second thought. He was making my sandwich. FML

by Shoofly / 03/04/2011 at 5:54pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up and stepped out of bed right into a pile of dog crap. Acting quickly, I jumped on to my other foot, which would have been a great idea, except for this morning there were two piles. FML

by unknown / 02/04/2011 at 3:11am / Animals

Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML

by 123roomielover / 01/26/2011 at 12:40pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when a large lady and her friend blocked the aisle I was trying to go down. After saying, "Excuse me," twice and being ignored, I pushed my way through. After getting past, I looked back and noticed she was glaring at me while signing to her friend. FML

by Anonymous / 01/20/2011 at 2:34pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 4:53am / France / Intimacy

Today, I found some nude vintage pictures in my house. I decided to beat my meat to them. Later I found out it was my grandma. FML

by Gabriel A / 01/14/2011 at 11:05pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

by Anonymous / 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I met my father for the first time since I was a baby. The first comment out of his mouth was, "I bet all the boys love those motherfucking bazongas, don't they?" Hi, Dad. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2010 at 2:23pm / United Kingdom (York) / Intimacy

Today, a woman came to my counter and ordered 12 donuts. I said, "OK sure, a dozen donuts." She paused, looked at me with disgust and yelled, "I said 12, NOT a dozen." FML

by morenita27 / 12/20/2010 at 8:52pm / Canada / Work

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

by Wisconsin love / 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my mother why she didn't drink. She laughed and said, "The last time I drank was the night you were conceived. I didn't need any other disasters." FML

by Anonymous / 12/12/2010 at 4:55pm / United States (Kentucky) / Kids

Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML

by stifledbyyou / 12/11/2010 at 7:06pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work