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  • Number of visits : 8174
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Blueocean7's page activity

Visits<b>cocainewhore</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 11:50am<b>flyingflies</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 11:59pm<b>asiansapphire</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 11:21pm<b>fml0505</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 5:40am<b>ManUtdFan743</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 9:46pm<b>GeorgiaBea</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 8:33am<b>team_hale</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 8:29pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 7:42pm<b>AFaye3964</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 11:41am<b>Infamous278</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:53am<b>ChelzTheWolfGirl</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 5:00am<b>ohcheriecherie</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 11:45pm<b>piepiepiepiepie</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 3:35pm<b>lexiieeex3</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 1:53am<b>wildcats909</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 11:43am<b>rob02</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 12:46am<b>chouter21</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 1:04am<b>mia_marie01</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 12:00am

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Blueocean7's favorite FMLs

Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML

by Fat_abott / 01/05/2012 at 3:40pm / France / Animals

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2011 at 6:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2011 at 6:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend insisted that the dog stay in our bedroom while we had sex. He said it would prove his dominance, and "show the dog who's boss." My boyfriend needs to prove his self-worth to an animal. FML

by HBC / 12/10/2011 at 2:23am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I noticed an old bell at the bar so I rang it. It turns out that when you ring the bell, you buy shots for the whole bar. FML

by Christina / 12/05/2011 at 12:41am / Canada (British Columbia) / Money

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at the Black Friday Sale, a fully grown man hit my 5 year old daughter for an Xbox. In anger, I punched the guy and gave him a bloody nose. I'm now banned from Best Buy, and my daughter has a concussion. FML

by nicoreal89 / 11/25/2011 at 3:20am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me that if I ever cheated on him, he'll chop my body up and dispose of all the parts, but keep my boobies, because he likes them. FML

by Faithful / 11/24/2011 at 5:01am / Singapore / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2011 at 7:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up soaked in water. It seems at some point in the middle of the night, I woke up thirsty and opened the water bottle I keep on my nightstand. I managed to drink a little, but it seems I didn't manage to put the cap back on before losing consciousness again. FML

by Olorin / 11/07/2011 at 3:49pm / Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was attending my bachelor party. I watched a very attractive young girl dancing on a pole, giving me a seductive look. As she walked up to me, I realized it was my soon-to-be wife's younger sister. FML

by wellthisisawkward80 / 11/06/2011 at 1:15am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to cancel my birthday party because of snow. It's October. FML

by bethanygirl / 10/29/2011 at 3:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

by lolilovemyboyfriend / 10/19/2011 at 10:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, for our 3rd anniversary, I gave my boyfriend a watch, courtesy of Rolex. He gave me herpes, courtesy of his other girlfriend. FML

by stdpositivenow / 10/18/2011 at 10:16am / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, while at work being a waitress, this lady came in and requested to sit in the section I was waitressing. She held up a $100 bill and told me that if I was attentive to her needs, she would leave me a $100 tip. Excited, I waited on her hand and foot. She dined and dashed. FML

by moodyreallyrocks / 10/03/2011 at 9:05am / United States (Kentucky) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.