Blueocean7

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Blueocean7

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7810
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Blueocean7's page activity

Visits<b>cocainewhore</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 11:50am<b>flyingflies</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 11:59pm<b>asiansapphire</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 11:21pm<b>fml0505</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 5:40am<b>ManUtdFan743</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 9:46pm<b>GeorgiaBea</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 8:33am<b>team_hale</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 8:29pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 7:42pm<b>AFaye3964</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 11:41am<b>Infamous278</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:53am<b>ChelzTheWolfGirl</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 5:00am<b>ohcheriecherie</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 11:45pm<b>piepiepiepiepie</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 3:35pm<b>lexiieeex3</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 1:53am<b>wildcats909</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 11:43am<b>rob02</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 12:46am<b>chouter21</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 1:04am<b>mia_marie01</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 12:00am

Blueocean7's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of Blueocean7's badges

Blueocean7's favorite FMLs

Today, I got my giant Game of Thrones tattoo finished. Despite the fact that I had spelt it out for him, the artist wrote 'You no nothing John Snow'. It's the focal part of the tattoo. FML

by Heknowsnothing / 07/13/2016 at 5:09pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, while updating my résumé, I noticed that in my list of achievements it said "Torturing middle school students". I meant "tutoring", but I guess this explains why I'm still unemployed a year after I started looking for a job. FML

by fuckel4 / 07/01/2016 at 4:12pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work

Today, the paternity test came back. It's like I suspected all along; my "son" is actually my half-brother. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2016 at 12:23pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Kids

Today, I got really horny during a 10 hour shift, so I snuck into a storage room and relieved myself. Then as I went to leave the room, I noticed the security camera above the door. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2016 at 10:09am / United States (California) / Work

Today, even though my boyfriend knew that I was a devout catholic before he asked me on a date, he's pissed that I keep refusing to have sex. Apparently, he thought I was just playing hard to get and that I would eventually drop my panties like all the other slutty "religious" girls he claims to have fucked. FML

by Bethany / 05/20/2016 at 3:31pm / Germany / Intimacy

Today, I started my period almost a week earlier than I expected to. I also happened to be at the beach with a guy that I really liked when it started. He was the one who noticed, and he informed me by saying that we couldn't go back in the water or we would be eaten by sharks. FML

by Unsuspecting / 04/16/2016 at 8:23am / United States / Health

Today, I was driving to work and I got a text from my girlfriend. She said she was breaking up with me. I was a little heartbroken, but I had to get on with my day. I got to work and my boss fired me. Turns out, my boss and girlfriend have been having an affair and she told him to fire me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2016 at 9:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I donated a dollar to a kids charity at Lowe's. The cashier handed me a star to sign my name, I signed it and gave it back to her. She looked at me with disgust and asked what was wrong with me. I had to pull out my license to prove to her that my name is really Michael Myers. FML

Today, I got jumpscared, by my freshly-bathed grandma coming out of the bathroom without a towel on. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2016 at 2:45am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I spent nearly an hour trying to take a decent photo for my dating site profile. Not 20 minutes after uploading it, I got a message saying "Srsly dude stop trying, u look like Rosie O'Donnell." FML

by Anonymous / 01/09/2016 at 12:38am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I recently burned both my hands at work so I had to ask my husband for help changing my tampon, but he refused saying it would make him feel sick. This from the man who routinely sticks his tongue in my asshole when we have sex. FML

by anne / 01/07/2016 at 7:00am / Germany / Intimacy

Today, I showed my husband a recipe for the meal I wanted us to make tonight. He saw cumin was an ingredient and broke into hysterics. By the time he managed to stop laughing, he gasped that he couldn't eat something "with cumin it" and broke down laughing again. FML

by -__- / 12/26/2015 at 8:41am / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally felt ready to lose my virginity with my boyfriend. Unfortunately he was too embarrassed to go and buy some condoms, and suggested in all seriousness that we use a sandwich bag instead. FML

by angelisa / 11/21/2015 at 9:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to give my first hand-job while wearing fuzzy socks in a carpeted room. I reached out to touch his penis and shocked him. FML

by nnniii / 11/15/2015 at 11:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I discovered that my father is getting married. Overjoyed and confused because I didn't know he was dating, I called him up to congratulate him, and ask who she was. Apparently, his soon to be fiancée is my mother-in-law. My wife is not happy. FML

by Congrats? / 10/27/2015 at 11:16am / United States (Illinois) / Love