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Today, my fiancée told me that she wants us to have an open marriage. She reasons that since she doesn't equate sex with love, there's no logical reason for me to be against her having sex with other people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45268) - you deserved it (4112)
On 06/05/2013 at 4:40pm - love - by ApparentlyNotEno (man) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, my brother lost his first tooth, so I told him the tooth fairy is going to give him money. He now thinks The Rock is going to show up in his room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25489) - you deserved it (5831)
On 11/23/2011 at 2:14pm - kids - by G. Briones -
Today, I was giving a PowerPoint presentation in class. When I put my flash drive into the computer, my folder opened up and a nude picture of myself popped right up on a 110 inch projector screen for all 35 students to see. This is a 16 week course. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12387) - you deserved it (44361)
On 10/22/2011 at 9:25am - misc - by jaymash - United States (Michigan)
Today, while waiting for a doctors appointment, my husband started playing angry birds. Continually losing the game ended up raising his blood pressure to the point where he now has to have his medication changed. The new medication is $100 copay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20498) - you deserved it (2401)
On 08/26/2011 at 8:20pm - health - by Username - United States
Today, I walked in on my new college roommate holding his cock. He said "Hi I'm Jeffrey, and this is Jeffrey junior" while directing attention towards his penis. It's going to be a long semester. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29339) - you deserved it (2191)
On 08/25/2011 at 1:26am - intimacy - by InAnAwkwardSituation - United States (New York)
Today, life gave me lemons, delivering them straight to my nuts via my neighbor's tennis ball shooter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18936) - you deserved it (1637)
On 08/25/2011 at 12:24am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I went to the House of Horrors at Universal Studios. People dressed up as monsters would jump at us, and I was so freaked out that I tripped. My equally terrified mom fell on top of me. Frankenstein's monster was nice enough to ask us if we were alright. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12677) - you deserved it (10267)
On 08/24/2011 at 2:32am - misc - by Trimacle (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14750) - you deserved it (36736)
On 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by MissCan'tKeepAJob - United States (Texas)
Today, after a tennis lesson, the coach was picking up the stray tennis balls around the court. Trying to be helpful, I asked him, "Do you want me to grab your ball bag?" His eyeballs almost burst out of their sockets. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20580) - you deserved it (5604)
On 08/18/2011 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by BigmouthStrikesAgain (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my boss stopped mid-walk during a conversation about the humidity in our office, after I told him I didn't like the air conditioner on, because I'd rather not be cold and wet, and that I liked it warm and sticky. I knew then he was no longer thinking about the AC. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9163) - you deserved it (22897)
On 08/17/2011 at 9:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, while walking in the city with my little sister, she let go of my hand. Not wanting to lose her, I quickly tried to grab it back. That resulted in me grabbing some 50 year old man's junk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29122) - you deserved it (888)
On 08/08/2011 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by Sharee K. - United States (New Jersey)
Monday 17 June 2013
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