About Bludmagnus : Just a guy.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Today, I introduced my boyfriend of two weeks to my parents. My dad asked me to leave the room so they could have some "guy talk". I eavesdropped, only to hear the words "sex-crazed f*ck" and a threat to stick bamboo shoots under my boyfriend's fingernails if he ever hurt me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21061) - you deserved it (3204)
On 01/15/2012 at 2:26pm - love - by soontobedumped (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I switched from pads to tampons. It took me several botched attempts trying insert one before I succeeded, and now I feel like I've just raped myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28514) - you deserved it (10414)
On 01/15/2012 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by lolwut - United States
Today, I started a new medication, not paying much notice to the one side effect: "unusual vaginal secretions". They're unusual alright, they glued my underwear to my skin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26331) - you deserved it (2723)
On 01/15/2012 at 4:00am - intimacy - by involuntary waxing - Canada (Alberta)
Today, while spending the night at a friend's house, I was woken up by someone kicking me. I figured she was having a nightmare, and since we were sharing a bed, I reached over to wake her up. Turns out it was her boyfriend trying to push me off the bed because they were having sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31442) - you deserved it (2151)
On 01/14/2012 at 6:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got into an argument with my wife over how she spends too much time with her gay best friend. Now she says that if I want to ever get intimate with her again, I'll have to let her watch as I give him a striptease. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26415) - you deserved it (7020)
On 01/14/2012 at 2:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, the quality of my sex life reached a new low. I faked my orgasm. And so did he. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11759) - you deserved it (15559)
On 01/14/2012 at 8:15am - intimacy - by sosadbuttrue - Switzerland (Glarus)
Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20177) - you deserved it (6492)
On 01/14/2012 at 1:52am - intimacy - by haggisbowl - United States
Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21596) - you deserved it (2772)
On 01/13/2012 at 5:47am - intimacy - by doctorsandnurses (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)
Today, my girlfriend's Marine dad walked in on us fooling around naked. Now we can only hang out with "parental supervision". Oh, and I have to record my visits on a clipboard by the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16508) - you deserved it (23932)
On 01/12/2012 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Duplighost (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, while working at a pizza place with my girlfriend, I called my boss to tell him we were short on sausage. Under her breath I heard my girlfriend say, "sounds like somebody I know." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26377) - you deserved it (2967)
On 01/11/2012 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I slashed my ass open with a shard of glass. How? I was making out with my crush, and threw my glasses on the ground. I forgot about them when we decided to lie down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9203) - you deserved it (20293)
On 01/11/2012 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by Dockin (man) - India
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10282) - you deserved it (22458)
On 01/11/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by bunnyluver4545 - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out what its like to have your boyfriend's mom find your hidden stash of condoms in your car, then spend the next two hours shopping with her. Alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19808) - you deserved it (4564)
On 01/07/2012 at 1:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had a job interview. I was feeling good about it until I saw the interviewer. It was a guy I had sex with and never called again. He remembered me too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12490) - you deserved it (33678)
On 01/05/2012 at 11:00am - intimacy - by jwshrieky - Canada (Ontario)
Today, after months of dating, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to take things to the next level. He told me that he couldn't have sex with me because of his religious beliefs. I would've been fine with this if it weren't for the fact that I know he and his family are all atheists. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26030) - you deserved it (2933)
On 01/04/2012 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Anon - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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