Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Bloink

Offline (6 hours ago) | Search for a member

Bloink

1Liked!

BloinkBloink
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 July 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 18007
  • Number of comments : 216
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About Bloink : "I'd agree with you but then we'd both be wrong"

Bloink's page activity

Visits<b>Sexomancer</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 2:02am<b>ZiggysMommy512</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:58am<b>badmandilon</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 3:04pm<b>xxthechosenguyxx</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 12:40pm<b>Devindelon</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 10:00am<b>ironhead</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 9:48am<b>CurtisGirl</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 10:38am<b>1dvos_grl3</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 12:23am<b>BakenWake420</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 12:22am<b>tehaustiebear</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 5:49pm<b>Ausdank</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 1:46pm<b>hotrodman</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:25am<b>YourAuntsCousin</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 10:54pm<b>sallee23444</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 1:40am<b>linbabe17</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 12:34am<b>zombie_ninja_24</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:42am<b>JMichael</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 3:47am<b>sturschaedel</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 4:35pm

Liked!<b>linbabe17</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:33am

Bloink's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Bloink's badges

Bloink's favorite FMLs

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

#21294899
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40275) - you deserved it (3424)

On 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm - kids - by jennabee97 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he got up and said he needed to go home because he was tired and just wanted to relax and watch TV. That's what we were doing. FML

#21293619
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32262) - you deserved it (3631)

On 11/06/2014 at 7:30pm - love - by really - United States

Today, I learned that the blisters that popped up this morning on my hands and feet are a result of a virus that takes two weeks to fully heal. After I told my roommates to be careful, one of them decided that NOW was a good time to tell us she had it last week. FML

#21292851
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29592) - you deserved it (1806)

On 11/05/2014 at 5:52pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend gushed for several minutes about how amazing it is that I suddenly look hot when he takes his glasses off. FML

#21292702
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31070) - you deserved it (2998)

On 11/05/2014 at 1:49pm - love - by aspiemeanswell (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)

Today, we are reading Animal Farm in class. Almost the entire class think it's about animal abuse. Including the teacher. FML

#21291068
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36686) - you deserved it (2534)

On 11/03/2014 at 6:04am - misc - by literature -

Today, I was stuck in the elevator at my building, so I pushed the emergency button which made a ringing noise. After half an hour, I hear someone yelling to the elevator, "Could you stop pushing that button, there are kids sleeping." FML

#21289322
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32228) - you deserved it (2150)

On 10/31/2014 at 9:26pm - misc - by Virginy - France

Today, I was a pregnant man for Halloween. Everyone at school thought it was funny, except my principal, who gave me a detention and said it was, "inappropriate and making a pregnant teacher feel uncomfortable". That pregnant teacher asked me to take a selfie with her. FML

#21289257
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34604) - you deserved it (2158)

On 10/31/2014 at 7:28pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I overheard my co-workers talking about how they don't need flu shots because everyone else gets them. These people are in the medical industry. FML

#21286250
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31159) - you deserved it (2936)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40am - work - by Silbax1 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32679) - you deserved it (4560)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mother locked me out of the house. Why? The dog and her needed some time to talk. FML

#21285216
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31425) - you deserved it (2374)

On 10/25/2014 at 8:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was passing notes in class with my crush. I started to pour my heart out and tell him about how I've liked him for years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it, laughed, and tore it up. He then looked at me and said, "I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome." FML

#21283544
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38015) - you deserved it (10032)

On 10/23/2014 at 12:04am - love - by Rachel - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29778) - you deserved it (7885)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I took my printer to work because the one in my office is broken. When I tried to leave, my boss stopped me and accused me of stealing it from the office. Nobody would believe me when I explained. Now my boss has a new printer. FML

#21280817
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33196) - you deserved it (5644)

On 10/19/2014 at 12:11am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my psycho mom walked in while I was chilling and having fun with some friends. She kicked them out and now wants to drug test me, because "Nobody's that happy without drugs". FML

#21280487
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38233) - you deserved it (2562)

On 10/18/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I learned that if you give a squirrel a cookie, he'll climb up your pants in search of more cookies. FML



Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML
  • Hello everyone, how's it going? You doing OK? Friday is the right time to get your glad rags on, go out, meet your friends, have a drink, get your freak on, shoot the breeze, shoot some hoops, don't shoot…

Friday 30 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: