Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Bloink

Offline (yesterday at 5:34am) | Search for a member

Bloink

1Liked!

BloinkBloink
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 July 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13884
  • Number of comments : 212
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About Bloink : "I'd agree with you but then we'd both be wrong"

Bloink's page activity

Visits<b>1dvos_grl3</b> - yesterday at 12:23am<b>BakenWake420</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 12:22am<b>tehaustiebear</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 5:49pm<b>Ausdank</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 1:46pm<b>ironhead</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 1:15pm<b>hotrodman</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:25am<b>YourAuntsCousin</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 10:54pm<b>sallee23444</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 1:40am<b>linbabe17</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 12:34am<b>zombie_ninja_24</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:42am<b>JMichael</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 3:47am<b>sturschaedel</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 4:35pm<b>dudeman1212</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 8:47pm<b>FatedB</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 12:51am<b>Cruzg2017</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 10:48pm<b>vegemute</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 10:33pm<b>gracewinchester</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 7:00pm<b>Enslaved</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 2:02am

Liked!<b>linbabe17</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:33am

Bloink's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of Bloink's badges

Bloink's favorite FMLs

Today, I was a pregnant man for Halloween. Everyone at school thought it was funny, except my principal, who gave me a detention and said it was, "inappropriate and making a pregnant teacher feel uncomfortable". That pregnant teacher asked me to take a selfie with her. FML

#21289257
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34547) - you deserved it (2154)

On 10/31/2014 at 7:28pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I overheard my co-workers talking about how they don't need flu shots because everyone else gets them. These people are in the medical industry. FML

#21286250
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31137) - you deserved it (2932)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40am - work - by Silbax1 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32603) - you deserved it (4552)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mother locked me out of the house. Why? The dog and her needed some time to talk. FML

#21285216
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31359) - you deserved it (2373)

On 10/25/2014 at 8:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was passing notes in class with my crush. I started to pour my heart out and tell him about how I've liked him for years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it, laughed, and tore it up. He then looked at me and said, "I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome." FML

#21283544
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37959) - you deserved it (10008)

On 10/23/2014 at 12:04am - love - by Rachel - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29512) - you deserved it (7818)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I took my printer to work because the one in my office is broken. When I tried to leave, my boss stopped me and accused me of stealing it from the office. Nobody would believe me when I explained. Now my boss has a new printer. FML

#21280817
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33158) - you deserved it (5635)

On 10/19/2014 at 12:11am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my psycho mom walked in while I was chilling and having fun with some friends. She kicked them out and now wants to drug test me, because "Nobody's that happy without drugs". FML

#21280487
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38193) - you deserved it (2559)

On 10/18/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I learned that if you give a squirrel a cookie, he'll climb up your pants in search of more cookies. FML

Today, I got the best grade in class on my economics midterm. Rather than tell me I did a good job, my professor criticized me in front of everyone about how I was working "too hard". FML

#21279849
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36636) - you deserved it (3579)

On 10/17/2014 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by katsaysner - United States (Maine)

Today, I walked into my house and saw it was flooded. I went upstairs to the bathroom to see the toilet overflowing and my boyfriend holding my dog over it so he could drink it. My boyfriend said he didn't know what else to do. FML

#21279204
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34487) - you deserved it (3453)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

#21278553
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35576) - you deserved it (3733)

On 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while waiting for a plane, a man in a wheelchair was struggling to get to baggage, so I helped him. I did so without realising that I passed through the "No Entry" gate. What did I forget? My phone, my ID, and my boarding pass. What do you need to get back to the plane? All of those. FML

Today, I woke up to find that my acne has lined itself beautifully in a perfect 'L' shape in the centre of my forehead. FML

Today, I was mowing my grandma's lawn when I was suddenly swarmed by bees. When my grandma saw me covered in stings later on, she said, "Oh yeah, there are tons of bees in the grass! Be careful!" FML

#21274044
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32597) - you deserved it (2224)

On 10/09/2014 at 2:51am - health - by bees - United States (Pennsylvania)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: