Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Bloink

Offline (9 hours ago) | Search for a member

Bloink

1Liked!

BloinkBloink
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 July 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 17762
  • Number of comments : 216
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About Bloink : "I'd agree with you but then we'd both be wrong"

Bloink's page activity

Visits<b>Sexomancer</b> - 15 hours ago<b>ZiggysMommy512</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:58am<b>badmandilon</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 3:04pm<b>xxthechosenguyxx</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 12:40pm<b>Devindelon</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 10:00am<b>ironhead</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 9:48am<b>CurtisGirl</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 10:38am<b>1dvos_grl3</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 12:23am<b>BakenWake420</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 12:22am<b>tehaustiebear</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 5:49pm<b>Ausdank</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 1:46pm<b>hotrodman</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:25am<b>YourAuntsCousin</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 10:54pm<b>sallee23444</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 1:40am<b>linbabe17</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 12:34am<b>zombie_ninja_24</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:42am<b>JMichael</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 3:47am<b>sturschaedel</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 4:35pm

Liked!<b>linbabe17</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:33am

Bloink's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Bloink's badges

Bloink's favorite FMLs

Today, instead of taking down the Christmas tree, my sister covered it with Valentine's Day decorations. FML

Today, I fell asleep curling my bangs. I now look like Mrs. Potato head. FML

#21345701
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7656) - you deserved it (5321)

On 01/28/2015 at 5:20pm - misc - by WildShortstop13 - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I had a job interview at a café. The interviewer asked me my availability and I told her that I was fully flexible. She laughed and said, "Really? That's tragic." FML

#21345516
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16917) - you deserved it (1525)

On 01/28/2015 at 8:09am - work - by tipmeover (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, after I got home from a long day at work. I go inside my room and find a life-size cut out of Miley Cyrus. I don't know how it got here. I'm the only person with a key to my apartment. FML

#21345231
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19442) - you deserved it (1356)

On 01/27/2015 at 6:46pm - misc - by I'm screwed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I bought an electric toothbrush because they're supposed to be a lot healthier than regular ones. My crazy religious mom immediately called me a whore and said she knew what I really wanted to use it for. So that's $80 in the trash. FML

#21343820
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24931) - you deserved it (2211)

On 01/25/2015 at 2:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I realized my job working with food is getting to me. While having sex with my boyfriend, I fell asleep. He asked me what I was doing, and apparently I sleep-talked, saying "I'm chopping lettuce". FML

#21343098
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28226) - you deserved it (3567)

On 01/23/2015 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by xoragebaby - United States

Today, I found out why I receive random drug tests at work. The safety department was specifically told by my boss to check up on me because I always seem way too cheerful to not be high. I've passed every single test. FML

#21342840
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28204) - you deserved it (2212)

On 01/23/2015 at 11:41am - work - by Ineedlotsofwater (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I caught my girlfriend Googling how to uninstall Siri. I asked why she wanted to do that, and she said, "I don't like it. I don't like how the slut talks to you." I get the feeling I'll need a gun when I break up with this crazy fucker. FML

#21342067
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31956) - you deserved it (4597)

On 01/22/2015 at 1:41am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a customer tried to order a Zinger burger. I tried to explain that he was at McDonalds and that the Zinger is a KFC burger. He accused me of lying to him and tried to report me to my manager. FML

#21339341
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28583) - you deserved it (1969)

On 01/18/2015 at 2:04am - work - by McSlave - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I took my driving test. I was really nervous, but I thought I did pretty well in the end. That is until I parked the car and looked to the examiner. He was visibly shaken. He said I'd passed, quickly filled in the paperwork and left. On the downside, my car still smells of his shart. FML

#21339037
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30195) - you deserved it (3152)

On 01/17/2015 at 5:24pm - misc - by for shite's sake (man) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)

Today, I accidentally spilled a big glass of water on the table, where I had some papers, my cellphone, and a box of donuts. With lightning reflexes, my sister heroically jumped forward and saved the donuts. FML

#21338246
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25947) - you deserved it (8566)

On 01/16/2015 at 12:09pm - misc - by phones - United States

Today, I asked out a girl that I've liked for a while. She thought I was joking and laughed, saying, "No. Have you met yourself?" FML

#21338134
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31829) - you deserved it (2835)

On 01/16/2015 at 7:49am - love - by SilverZephyr - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I gambled on a fart and lost. FML

#21337828
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23373) - you deserved it (14980)

On 01/15/2015 at 8:08pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I have bad adult acne. This wouldn't be so bad, except that it's only on one side of my face. I look like a Batman villain. FML

#21337414
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28374) - you deserved it (2205)

On 01/15/2015 at 2:28am - health - by twoface_chick - United States (California)

Today, I was faced with the inevitable horrible circumstances which lead me to put in a tampon on a moving city bus. FML

#21337228
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30239) - you deserved it (4537)

On 01/14/2015 at 9:18pm - misc - by bloody_hell (woman) - United States (Indiana)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: