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BlacOpsMaximus

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BlacOpsMaximus
  • Town/Country : Phoenix, U.S.A.
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 April 1993 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 436
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About BlacOpsMaximus : Nothing much to say,, so just email me if you'd like. :D

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BlacOpsMaximus's favorite FMLs

Today, a wasp flew into my room. While I, a 6'2" hockey player, cowered in the corner, my 4'11" girlfriend killed it. FML

#8770884
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7518) - you deserved it (32988)

On 03/02/2010 at 10:53am - animals - by Jeff - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I watched Cast Away with my girlfriend after not seeing it for a year. I forgot how sad it was when Wilson "dies" at the end. I cried. My girlfriend told me to man up. FML

#8756246
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9163) - you deserved it (20694)

On 03/01/2010 at 8:17pm - misc - by whywilson.. (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188
399 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38690) - you deserved it (8815)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561
449 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6340) - you deserved it (50110)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML

#8612395
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17656) - you deserved it (3052)

On 02/24/2010 at 10:06am - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend told me I look like a fish gasping for breath when I "finish" during sex. FML

#8605732
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15150) - you deserved it (3700)

On 02/24/2010 at 12:05am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Montana)

Today, my dad thought it'd be funny to put an Edward Cullen cutout behind my car as I backed it out the garage to see my reaction. Oh it was funny alright, except I was so scared that when I saw him through the mirror I reacted by stepping on the gas. We now have half a garage door. FML

#7605430
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18773) - you deserved it (7148)

On 01/27/2010 at 1:21am - misc - by garage - Sent from mobile version

Today, I complained to my boyfriend that I was stressed out. He asked me then "What do you have to be stressed out about?" I work 50 hours a week and go to school full time. I ask him what was stressful about his day, he told me that his "kill/death ratio went down on Call of Duty". FML

#6459212
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26335) - you deserved it (6927)

On 11/26/2009 at 5:18am - love - by amy1023 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at the mall with my friend when I saw my boyfriend in Victoria's Secret - with another girl. They were joking and laughing, and I was really pissed off. So I stormed into the store and slapped him. He looked up at me with an angry and confused expression. It wasn't my boyfriend. FML

#4007461
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8348) - you deserved it (65092)

On 07/24/2009 at 3:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



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