BimmerDriver

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Offline (the 08/05/2014 at 5:10am)

BimmerDriver

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 June 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3307
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 8 posted

About BimmerDriver : Hello, my name is Taylor and i'm 18 years young. I check FML about once or twice a day on my phone when I get bored. I love BMWs. I drive a 1995 BMW M5, a 2011 BMW 335xi, and a 2005 Land Rover Range Rover. I bought them with my own hard earned money and hope to one day own new models of both. (Although the e34 M5 is sexier than any new BMW in my opinion).

Edit:
Sadly my e34 M5 is currently replaced by an e38 740i

BimmerDriver's page activity

Visits<b>bolee997</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 3:20pm<b>Fed21</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 4:52am<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 4:58am<b>EevieBear</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 9:02pm<b>Kris_326</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 9:53pm<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 2:23pm<b>californian21</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 7:12am<b>jairolover</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 8:46pm<b>Swarley4</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 3:32am<b>eski2015</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 11:00pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 9:09pm<b>FMLollipop</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 11:29pm<b>Jkalia</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 7:32pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 1:05am<b>Michaelaarnett</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 3:02am<b>cocomalo8</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 12:29am<b>dylanj0119</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 4:38pm<b>SyLord</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 11:33am

Fucked!<b>Fed21</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 10:53am<b>jairolover</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 2:46am<b>eski2015</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 5:00am<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:53pm<b>blackeyeidiot</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 4:25am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 2:04pm

BimmerDriver's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of BimmerDriver's badges

BimmerDriver's favorite FMLs

Today, I knocked over a display case at a mall, shattering hundreds of dollars in goods. Embarrassed, I tried to scurry out of the nearest door without being seen. I scuttled right into the janitor's closet, the door automatically locking behind me. I waited for an hour to be let out. FML

by Jer / 07/15/2013 at 7:36pm / United States (Kentucky) / Money

Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2013 at 4:27pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

by John / 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a dream about marrying Hitler. I've had this same dream three times now. My subconscious is starting to scare me. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2013 at 3:11am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I hid my parents' booze since I'd always thought their shitty behavior was due to drinking too much. Turns out they're just assholes. FML

by Acidic Donut / 06/30/2013 at 7:48pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, what started off as an amazing date with my girlfriend ended with me driving her drunk ass home while she sat in the backseat making out with her new boyfriend. FML

by BimmerDriver / 06/30/2013 at 12:34pm / United States (New York) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a drunk driver drove his car through my mailbox. He got pissed, started yelling, and threatened to sue me for "putting the mailbox in the middle of the road". If my front lawn is a road, I'm going to have some serious issues. FML

by Anonymous / 06/29/2013 at 12:52pm / United States / Transportation

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to change the language setting on my phone to Mandarin. Unfortunately, neither of us knows Mandarin, and we can't change it back to English. FML

by damniphone / 06/29/2013 at 1:31am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend's proposal speech somehow ended with him breaking up with me. FML

by confusedandnowsingle / 06/28/2013 at 8:23am / Finland (Southern Finland) / Love

Today, I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29, my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

by young grandpa / 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML

by Thanks Honey / 06/05/2013 at 11:08am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

by fuckshitcockwaffle / 05/31/2013 at 10:59am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, a few freshmen jumped my fence. They decided to take a dip in the pool, so I pulled out a paintball gun. I unloaded over 100 rounds, painting their backs bright yellow. It also dyed my pool yellow, and it'll apparently cost around $500 to repair. FML

by pool party / 05/28/2013 at 8:48pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, my friends and I were talking about the creepy stranger that used to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changed a lot through the years because I found out that he's my current boyfriend of 4 months. FML

by datgirl92 / 05/24/2013 at 10:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, after months of being pestered to do so, I finally read the first Harry Potter book. I hated it. Upon hearing this, my girlfriend posted the fact on Facebook, where I immediately received tons of abuse and eventual shunning by my friends, family, and coworkers. My girlfriend just laughed. FML

by obnum / 05/24/2013 at 8:26am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous