BigEV

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BigEV

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 May 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3795
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About BigEV : I\'m not new to FML at all. I\'m only making an account for comments.

A few things I don\'t like:

- Seeing people who say that they hit YDI before finishing the FML.

- The abundance of these unentertaining relationship FMLs.

I doubt that anyone wants to know anything about me, so I\'m done.

BigEV's page activity

Visits<b>tbabe420</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 7:18pm<b></b> - the 01/24/2011 at 2:15am

BigEV's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

BigEV's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend sent me a sexy picture of herself in my boxers. I thought it would be funny to take a picture of myself in the thong she left in my room and send it to her. She thought it would be funnier on Facebook. FML

by kdeeeceee / 11/05/2011 at 3:25am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at work I asked a cute, albeit slightly large customer, her name. Being hard of hearing, I thought she said "Porky" and asked her about it. Turns out she'd said Courtney. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 3:12am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, during my fourth solo day working as a meter-maid, I had a vehicle towed for being parked in front of a fire hydrant. The vehicle belonged to the governor. I'm scared to even show my face at work next week. FML

by NoMoreMeters / 10/28/2011 at 8:19pm / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML

by KaySchrages92 / 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2011 at 2:55am / United States (Missouri) / Animals

Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML

by pokeballbra / 10/17/2011 at 1:44am / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

by Good sister / 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, somebody ordered pizza and sent it to the house across the street from them, so they could shoot at the pizza guy with an air-soft gun from the upstairs of their house. I was that delivery guy. FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2011 at 4:17am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2011 at 10:01pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought my hamster might be lonely, so I went to the pet shop and bought a new one to keep him company. The new hamster killed the old one. FML

by squeak / 09/12/2011 at 9:52am / United Kingdom (London) / Animals

Today, I tried to scare a new college friend by sneaking up behind her wearing a mask. It worked. And so did her lightning fast reflexes developed from multiple martial arts championships. My 2 cracked ribs, broken nose and bruised ballsack can now be added to her list of achievements. FML

by only1bigdogme / 09/03/2011 at 1:24am / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, while working in my pharmacy, a patient told me that he sometimes wants to jump the counter and skin me alive. He has no more refills, and his doctor is out of town for the week. FML

by Anonymous / 09/01/2011 at 2:22am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML

by MJjunior / 08/31/2011 at 12:04pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Kids

Today, I was at my family reunion. I've always hated my family. I walked up behind my husband and said, "I can't wait to go home and make love." My husband turned around. It was my uncle wearing the same hat as my husband. FML

by dev / 08/28/2011 at 2:18am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I was out shopping when an old lady bumped into me and dropped her purse. Trying to help, I bent over to pick it up, at which point she battered the shit out of me, called me a "filthy thief" and threatened to open an umbrella in my ass. What the fuck has the world come to? FML

by Anonymous / 08/25/2011 at 5:17pm / United States / Miscellaneous