BestestMama

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Offline (the 02/01/2016 at 8:44am)

BestestMama

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8081
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About BestestMama : Love my baby , love my babe/bestest.
Thee end.

BestestMama's page activity

Visits<b>Camwentz</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 2:20am<b>purplebabytacos1</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 1:58pm<b>KarlwithaK91</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 2:33am<b>BrendenTaylor</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 7:02pm<b>xSavaqee</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 6:40am<b>MiaChante</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 1:56pm<b>ninjuh_wingman</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 3:58pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 4:40pm<b>izzie321</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 2:09pm<b>LukeE45</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 2:51pm<b>Mr_Leading</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 11:32pm<b>xJAGx1505x</b> - the 01/30/2013 at 11:11am<b>erpaderp</b> - the 10/16/2011 at 8:25pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:11pm<b>cufaoil</b> - the 07/24/2011 at 8:47pm<b>deputy_g</b> - the 02/27/2011 at 7:24pm<b>sweet_candy_</b> - the 01/22/2011 at 10:04pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 1:39am

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BestestMama's favorite FMLs

Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML

by couldntholdit / 07/12/2011 at 1:09pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I took my 16 year-old daughter to get a bank account, taking her birth certificate with us as requested. When the teller wrote her name down on a piece of paper, my daughter said "How do you know my name?" The teller just looked at her and held up her birth certificate. I raised a nitwit. FML

by Mothering / 07/11/2011 at 5:25am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2011 at 9:07pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

by aarone23 / 06/01/2011 at 9:30am / United States (Oklahoma) / Transportation

Today, my only motivation to get out of bed was cupcakes in the refrigerator. FML

by skigal24 / 05/30/2011 at 10:59am / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I ate some hardboiled eggs for breakfast, not knowing they were practically rotten. My whole day has consisted of vomit-inducing sulfuric farts and diarrhea. FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2011 at 3:26am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

by ouch / 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML

by -_- / 03/28/2011 at 10:22pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, the dog went nuts at 3am. I searched the yard with a spotlight and machete. Nothing. He may actually just be an asshole. FML

by panda / 03/03/2011 at 6:20am / Animals

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

by Anon. / 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I realized it feels better when I sneeze than when my boyfriend and I have sex. FML

by horriblegf / 02/26/2011 at 7:18am / United States / Intimacy

Today, a friend and I saw some deer outside my car. Since we were both leaving for college the next day we wanted to do something memorable so we decided to chase the deer. Turns out the deer wanted to chase us too. We ran for over five minutes screaming. FML

by Anonymous / 01/22/2011 at 4:03am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I braved the winter weather conditions to get to a clinic for a prescription anti-diarrhea medication. When I arrived to find it closed, I turned around to walk to my car where I slipped on the ice. The impact made me simultaneously bruise my elbow and shit myself. FML

by chelseaface / 01/21/2011 at 10:13am / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, I found out how hard a lemon is to the nuts when being hurled by an angry girlfriend for losing at Wii Sports. FML

by neverhavingkids / 01/20/2011 at 9:24pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, it was my daughter's birthday. She had been wanting a cat for a long time, so I went to the animal shelter and got an orange one. As soon as she saw it, she ran upstairs screaming, "GINGER! GINGER!" She refuses to come downstairs until I get rid of "the soulless creature." FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2011 at 10:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids