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About BenjiX : I prefer to be called Benji. And you've found my hiding place. I play bass for a band I'm trying to piece together. Don't force your religion down my throat. I don't care what people think of me, and I will laugh at you for attempting to insult me. I enjoy all kinds of music from In This Moment, Snow White's Poison Bite, Blood On The Dance Floor, and Black Veil Brides, to Beebs and Her MoneyMakers, Kesha, Katy Perry, and Carly Rae Jepsen. I love movies, Horror, War, Comedy. Breaking Bad, The Walking Dead, South Park, American Dad, Family Guy, Dog With A Blog, Good Luck Charlie, Wizards Of Waverly Place, and Liv And Maddie are my favorite shows. I have about 15 different fetishes, and I have sex with pans (not literally of course.) The only things I want out of life is to play in a band, a 98 Mitsubishi Eclipse GSX, a Nissan Skyline GT-R34 and to fall asleep holding someone cute. Feel free to message me if you'd like. I bite, but only if you ask :] @BenjiXBass Facebook.com/foozc
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I finally gave in to my long-distance boyfriend's requests and texted him dirty things. Any time I would send him something, he would reply, "What?" or "What do you mean?" Either I'm not doing this right, or I'm in a relationship with the most innocent person ever. FML
Today, I watched my daughter squealing with delight in front of a video game. Beating a boss? Slaying an adversary? Completing a quest? Not at all. She was chasing birds, making them fly away, then starting all over again as soon as they landed. She's 19. FML
Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML
Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were quite drunk while we were fooling around on the couch, when I decided I wanted to lose my virginity to her. I was two thrusts in when she burst out laughing. Looking down, I realized I was between her cheeks and the couch cushion. I lost my virginity to her couch. FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML
Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML
Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML
Today, it was my birthday, so when I woke up, I came downstairs yelling, "ALL I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY, IS A BIG BOOTY HOE," only to find that my family had thrown me a surprise party. All my grandparents were at the bottom of the stairs. FML
Thursday 11 September 2014