BendyStraw

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BendyStraw

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 23 January 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 16634
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About BendyStraw : I'm Sam. I'm 15. I love FMyLife. I've read more than half of the FMLs out there (forreals)
Leave me a message. ;)

Have a nice day Sir/Ma'am.

BendyStraw's page activity

Visits<b>Addiction333</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 10:58pm<b>turtlescape</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 1:42am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:09pm<b>Drakon</b> - the 08/25/2011 at 9:36pm

BendyStraw's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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BendyStraw's favorite FMLs

Today, I was quietly admiring my boyfriend from outside the kitchen as he made us dinner, only to witness him drop a load of spaghetti on the floor, swear, then scoop it all up and place it back on the plate. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2013 at 1:31pm / France / Health

Today, while on a family Disney world vacation, I saw a kid shitting on a public bathroom's floor. It was my kid. He's 10. FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2013 at 12:33am / Kids

Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML

by Anonymous / 11/16/2013 at 2:31pm / Miscellaneous

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

by thank god you'll only live once / 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, the highly intoxicated singer of my band decided it would be a wonderful idea to squat down and take a shit on stage in the middle of a gig. FML

by dudeyouarefired / 12/20/2012 at 3:16am / Miscellaneous

Today, I noticed my wife put a bumper sticker on our car that says "Cowboy butts drive me nuts." I've driven that car to work every day. FML

by idontevenlikebuttsthatmuch / 12/18/2012 at 4:44pm / United States (Arizona) / Transportation

Today, my friends switched my mom and my girlfriend's numbers in my phone. I sexted my mom. FML

by ilovemymomma / 05/26/2012 at 3:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I brought my 90-year-old grandfather into school for a project that required to bring in "a first-hand account" of the Great Depression. He started off by telling the class how in his day, they "threw rocks at black people." FML

by Class / 05/11/2012 at 7:52pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to an eviction notice after an apartment inspection. The reason? Having an unauthorized pet that could cause unnecessary damage to my suite. My pet is a goldfish. FML

by goldfish / 03/05/2012 at 9:47pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

by Miss_Kristen / 02/26/2012 at 10:31am / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML

by 97 / 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog attacked me because I had a chicken costume on for a party. I'm currently in a hospital, dressed as a chicken, waiting for medical assistance. FML

by lulu / 02/11/2012 at 5:19am / United States (Ohio) / Animals

Today, my mother used global warming as an excuse for not remembering my birthday. FML

by Anonymous / 02/10/2012 at 4:07pm / Belgium (Brabant Wallon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence came out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm here to help you take a shit." FML

by Silver_Samurai / 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm / Netherlands / Work

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

by xX_nsn_Xx / 02/03/2012 at 9:47am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy