Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BellaMarta

Search for a member

BellaMarta

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 10 February 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3266
  • Number of comments : 220
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About BellaMarta : I'm a teenager. 'Nuf said.

BellaMarta's page activity

Visits<b>talkomatic713</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 6:23pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 6:42pm<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 5:01pm<b>adambomb8181</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 4:11pm<b>melcat</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 9:51am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 08/20/2012 at 5:09pm<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 08/19/2012 at 4:00pm<b>K_kanaka</b> - the 06/08/2012 at 4:22pm<b>newzealand</b> - the 05/20/2012 at 9:00am<b>prinzess</b> - the 05/07/2012 at 3:22am<b>missalice0306</b> - the 05/06/2012 at 9:06am<b>Souman</b> - the 04/01/2012 at 8:09pm<b>Johnnysalz</b> - the 03/26/2012 at 5:22pm<b>alexloveyou</b> - the 10/28/2011 at 3:07pm<b>Egnar</b> - the 10/26/2011 at 3:49pm<b>JoonBee</b> - the 10/25/2011 at 5:37pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 10/05/2011 at 7:43am<b>suckmysarcasm</b> - the 09/21/2011 at 9:28pm

BellaMarta's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of BellaMarta's badges

BellaMarta's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML

#19938552
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37212) - you deserved it (4458)

On 07/14/2012 at 8:50pm - intimacy - by checkup (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I woke up naked, duck taped to the wall with no memory of last night. FML

#19935617
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10120) - you deserved it (31463)

On 07/14/2012 at 1:49am - misc - by tapeissticky591 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I walked too close to a first-aid kit sticking out of a wall at work, and it cut my arm. Laughing at the irony, I opened it to get a band aid out. It was empty. FML

#19928485
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24990) - you deserved it (2409)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:28pm - work - by Ian Artis - United States

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

#19926709
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32654) - you deserved it (4117)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother had a party with over 60 people in my basement. It turns out that five different couples had sex under the same comforter. The comforter was mine. FML

#19923012
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31354) - you deserved it (2737)

On 07/11/2012 at 9:29am - intimacy - by Sherry - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I had this amazing dream that a beautiful girl was giving me head. It was getting really hot, so in my dream, I reached down to push on her head, but in real life I actually swung my arm down and punched myself in the balls. FML

#19918073
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18288) - you deserved it (36586)

On 07/10/2012 at 6:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I spoke to my hormonal pregnant wife about baby names. I told her I liked the name "Tabitha", and she went into a full rage about how all letters have textures, colours and emotions and how T is an evil letter. Apparently it's orange, plastic, and a needle trying to stab her eyes out. FML

#19913255
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25960) - you deserved it (3553)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:31am - kids - by LNamesOnly (man) - Australia

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML

#19903031
306 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62472) - you deserved it (5039)

On 07/07/2012 at 12:45am - health - by Dammit - United States (California)

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a diet coke?" FML

#19895683
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36186) - you deserved it (9029)

On 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I still can't decide whether masturbating while looking at myself makes me narcissistic or just plain pathetic. FML

#19890601
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8446) - you deserved it (32116)

On 07/04/2012 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to live with her father because they have a faster internet connection. FML

#19875787
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26297) - you deserved it (5576)

On 07/01/2012 at 12:00pm - kids - by grrr1234 -

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

#19870672
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49804) - you deserved it (2274)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:48am - health - by Jobby (woman) -

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, I realized I say "sorry" more than anything else during sex with my girlfriend. FML

#19869749
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24489) - you deserved it (8745)

On 06/30/2012 at 2:21am - intimacy - by mpsteve137 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to, used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML

#19851648
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23602) - you deserved it (1656)

On 06/26/2012 at 5:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • On FML, it's Halloween every day
  • As you know, we never pass up the chance to open up a light beer and plunge into the depths of the FML archive to come up with some sort of theme. Most holidays, national or otherwise, are pretty well represented.…

Friday 31 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: