About BekBek : boobpunch
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
The rules are the rules
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Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22266) - you deserved it (3162)
On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my boss reprimanded me in front of the rest of the staff for "not following instructions" because I went to a company meeting. I have the email from him telling me to go to the meeting. He thinks I faked it. Unemployment sucks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17305) - you deserved it (841)
On 08/23/2012 at 1:24am - work - by BrokeButSmart - United States (Indiana)
Today, I found myself trying to explain to my puppy why I'm still single. I think I just found out why. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13147) - you deserved it (3954)
On 08/18/2012 at 7:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17781) - you deserved it (4583)
On 08/16/2012 at 11:16am - love - by Amberain (woman) - United Kingdom (Halton)
Today, I discovered that I'm adopted. How? After a great lunch, I asked my uncle how he'd made the salad dressing. He replied, "Haha! It's a secret family recipe, my dear!" I wouldn't have thought twice about it, were it not for my parents' shocked expressions, and the long, awkward silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20655) - you deserved it (1122) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my brother thought it would be funny to pretend my tampons were "dynamite" and run around the house throwing them at my friends and family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15315) - you deserved it (1518)
On 07/05/2012 at 12:01am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was having a funny conversation with a guy I had met on Xbox. I told him the state I lived in, and he said, "Don't tell me that, I might stalk you." He wasn't kidding. He has somehow found out my phone number, and my address. He says he's going to send me flowers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10446) - you deserved it (22965)
On 06/22/2012 at 9:08am - misc - by ExplosiveDildo (woman) - Afghanistan
Today, my apartment has been echoing all day with the wails of my cat, Butters. He's yet again managed to trap himself in the umbrella stand. In the past, he has eventually gotten himself out, but this time I think I might have to use a hacksaw. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12574) - you deserved it (1977)
On 05/26/2012 at 5:35pm - misc - by Dom - South Africa (Eastern Cape)
Today, I went to a party dressed as a zombie. Everyone admired my hilarious "zombie dancing". Those were my regular dance moves. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13861) - you deserved it (3279)
On 05/10/2012 at 2:10pm - misc - by tinydancer (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I got my foot stuck in the car seat belt. I kept pulling to loosen it up but it just kept getting tighter till my foot was in the air, so I started panicking and eventually started crying. My boyfriend had to pull over and save me from a seat belt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6377) - you deserved it (15312)
On 03/29/2012 at 2:33am - misc - by greeneyedpothead - United States (California)
Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk. Almost before he could open his mouth, my mother popped her head into the room and said, "Be realistic, Dan. Who would want to sleep with that?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28252) - you deserved it (1763)
On 03/14/2012 at 10:01pm - misc - by CallaC (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31014) - you deserved it (3812)
On 02/06/2012 at 4:52pm - animals - by BoringFucker (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)
Today, the office tough guy learned how to use the fire extinguisher. On me. I wasn't on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16785) - you deserved it (1527)
On 01/24/2012 at 9:58pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)
Today, my neighbours kicked my football back over the fence. They'd slashed it and taped a note to the remains that said, "Do it again and it'll be your face." Now I'm scared to play football in my own backyard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19534) - you deserved it (2412)
On 11/25/2011 at 8:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, my friends and I were going to do an ugly sweater photo shoot. When we met up, one of them was wearing a sweater I gave on her birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20994) - you deserved it (8679)
On 11/25/2011 at 1:08pm - misc - by ravlol - United States (Missouri)
Friday 24 May 2013
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