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Bebbo's FML badges
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Bebbo's favorite FMLs
Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML
by notsofriendly / 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML
by too good / 10/24/2014 at 6:54am / United Kingdom (Kent) / Intimacy
Today, I was passing notes in class with my crush. I started to pour my heart out and tell him about how I've liked him for years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it, laughed, and tore it up. He then looked at me and said, "I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome." FML
by Rachel / 10/23/2014 at 12:04am / United States (Ohio) / Love
Today, I got my graduation photos back. I'd sent them to a friend for touching up, but unfortunately we had a major argument recently. I guess that's why in the photos I've been photoshopped out and replaced with a goat. FML
by Anonymous / 10/22/2014 at 1:37pm / United States (Texas) / Geek
Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML
by bluevix / 10/10/2014 at 9:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, was the day I would turn my life around and start losing weight. I went outside for my first run and said, "I got this!" I confidently stepped forward, the first symbolic steps to my new life. In the anticipation, I forgot my porch had steps. I face-planted on my driveway. FML
by PickYourselfUp / 10/05/2014 at 11:17pm / United States (Virginia) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/05/2014 at 11:47am / United States (Virginia) / Love
by notatherapist / 10/01/2014 at 7:08pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Intimacy
Today, on my first day of sailing practice, I managed to sit on a metal cleat. After being admitted to the ER, I was informed that I had two vaginal lacerations that needed surgery. The nurse tried to convince me it was my lucky day, because the hospital café was serving vanilla pudding. FML
by Anonymous / 09/29/2014 at 3:39pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Health
Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML
by jazzie7719 / 09/28/2014 at 3:26pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health
by Anonymous / 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by deathstar3548 / 09/22/2014 at 6:58am / United States (Florida) / Health
Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML
by Sinnersinner / 09/21/2014 at 7:27am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was hit with a sudden onset of diarrhea and had to use the washroom on the train. As soon as I pulled down my pants, my worst nightmare came true, as someone opened the door and exposed me to the other passengers. FML
by Bebbo / 09/19/2014 at 9:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
Today, I had made a cup of my favorite coffee, which I had recently found to be discontinued. To accompany this last cup, I went to get a muffin. As I turned around, I see my son pouring the cup out because I out put it next to the sink and he thought it was dirty. FML
by lucas_urev / 09/15/2014 at 6:19pm / United States (New York) / Kids
- Today, someone left a can of scentless bugspray next to the stove, I greased a cake pan with it and… Today, while brushing my teeth I felt something snap and spat out a huge tooth fragment. Only after… Today, at my oldest sisters wedding she forgot something borrowed. she looked at me and said if I'm…