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About BeautyInDiscord : My name is Amber. I love Doctor Who, The Hobbit, the Elder Scrolls, DnD, Tool, The Crow, and animals. I hate stupid people. o-o I am a vegetarian. So I'm serious about my passion for animals. So do not talk to me if you hunt. I love art. I draw, paint, and write poetry in my spare time. Edgar Allan Poe is one of my favorite poets/story writers. I'm very into romantic, dark things like that. Johnny the Homicidal Maniac is my favorite comic. I look up to Maynard James Keenan. Please don't use the words "faggot" or "gay" around me. I will automatically hate you and punch you in the throat. I love gaming. RPGs, LARP, and DnD all the way. ..yeah. That sounded a bit rushed. But there you go. thats me. Let's be friends.
I AM A YOUNG TIMELORD. t(O-Ot)
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Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML
Today, I showed the kids I was babysitting a picture of my daughter, and the little girl asked, "You have a baby in your belly?" I said, "No, she's not in my belly anymore," and the little girl replied, "But it's BIG," and patted my stomach. FML
Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML
Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in the Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML
Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML
Friday 21 November 2014