Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BeautyInDiscord

Search for a member

BeautyInDiscord

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 554
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About BeautyInDiscord : My name is Amber. I love Doctor Who, The Hobbit, the Elder Scrolls, DnD, Tool, The Crow, and animals. I hate stupid people. o-o I am a vegetarian. So I'm serious about my passion for animals. So do not talk to me if you hunt. I love art. I draw, paint, and write poetry in my spare time. Edgar Allan Poe is one of my favorite poets/story writers. I'm very into romantic, dark things like that. Johnny the Homicidal Maniac is my favorite comic. I look up to Maynard James Keenan. Please don't use the words "faggot" or "gay" around me. I will automatically hate you and punch you in the throat. I love gaming. RPGs, LARP, and DnD all the way. ..yeah. That sounded a bit rushed. But there you go. thats me. Let's be friends.

I AM A YOUNG TIMELORD. t(O-Ot)

BeautyInDiscord's page activity

Visits<b>Selki</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 7:07am<b>ty7in_topic</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 3:40pm<b>SadMansSandwich</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 10:05am<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 1:27pm<b>StevenMcCollum</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 1:20pm<b>A07</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 10:42am<b>ZDR</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 7:36pm<b>Dennisse_47</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 10:02pm<b>AGhost5445</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 9:54pm<b>Dmitchell</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 12:04am<b>persianninja</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 10:21pm<b>byramzd</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 9:55pm<b>rutalking2me</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 11:39pm<b>ChancellorW</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 1:16am<b>HuntersCreed</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 2:32am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 12:03pm<b>sinn3r76</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 12:06am<b>dantee2005</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 11:15am

BeautyInDiscord's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of BeautyInDiscord's badges

BeautyInDiscord's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my husband putting my anti-wrinkle cream on his balls. He said, "I thought it'd help." FML

#20822001
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48553) - you deserved it (4905)

On 08/05/2013 at 12:41pm - intimacy - by Serum - United States (Kansas)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68261) - you deserved it (9006)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I discovered that my wife named our kids after her former lovers. We have two sons and a daughter. FML

#20819538
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48618) - you deserved it (4862)

On 08/03/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was trying to be sexy in the bathtub for my boyfriend. I leaned back and caught my hair on fire with the candle. FML

#20818297
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43634) - you deserved it (14503)

On 08/03/2013 at 4:40am - love - by Msmerfner - United States (California)

Today, I showed the kids I was babysitting a picture of my daughter, and the little girl asked, "You have a baby in your belly?" I said, "No, she's not in my belly anymore," and the little girl replied, "But it's BIG," and patted my stomach. FML

#20817997
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43738) - you deserved it (7718)

On 08/03/2013 at 12:29am - kids - by kimm1993 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML

#20817205
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46347) - you deserved it (25302)

On 08/02/2013 at 3:44pm - intimacy - by fuck but no fuck (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in the Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML

#20816805
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59709) - you deserved it (7583)

On 08/02/2013 at 10:08am - intimacy - by right (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML

#20816318
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51723) - you deserved it (11182)

On 08/02/2013 at 12:39am - intimacy - by whyeventry? (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: