Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BeautifulLiesx

Search for a member

BeautifulLiesx

44Fucked!

BeautifulLiesx
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 February 1998 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3944
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 28 posted

About BeautifulLiesx : I'm a band geek. I am woodwind captain for my marching band. I play the alto saxophone and piano.

Message me, I won't bite.

BeautifulLiesx's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 7:26am<b>playhard_51</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 10:06pm<b>cdncw</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 11:59am<b>moron011</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 12:26am<b>fordboy101</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 11:41pm<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 1:03pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 9:00am<b>bigjake</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 8:00am<b>slackerjoe</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 9:33pm<b>last_kings84</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 3:00pm<b>wilbur4321</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 1:15am<b>jrmertz00</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 1:10am<b>kalani_smith621</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 12:31am<b>raven83</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 11:50pm<b>littlenightowl</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 11:23pm<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 5:00am<b>mattbaker</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 3:07am<b>bps315</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 4:35pm

Fucked!<b>RA91</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 8:58pm<b>ENCOURAGER</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 6:44pm<b>Melharr</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 5:35am<b>condor216</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 8:39pm<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 11:26am<b>man_in_black08</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 3:28am<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 3:30pm<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 5:54am<b>Imadeek</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 10:23pm<b>GeneralGuerrier</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 6:57am<b>xluciferx666</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 5:14am<b>tranced_</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 3:39am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 1:04am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 4:49am<b>pipefitter69</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 3:52pm<b>SweetIam</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 5:01am<b>Captain_Brittain</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 4:35am<b>scott421</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 2:30pm

BeautifulLiesx's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of BeautifulLiesx's badges

BeautifulLiesx's favorite FMLs

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

#20701323
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69728) - you deserved it (4267)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my friend made an effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML

#20700580
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42969) - you deserved it (4316)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:11am - misc - by fucker43 - United States (Georgia)

Today, after buying 3 new alarm clocks, I finally decided to video tape myself all night to figure out if my alarm clock was broken or if I was oversleeping. Turns out I wake up around 4am each day and turn them off without remembering. FML

#20700571
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52470) - you deserved it (6217)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:06am - misc - by sleepy momma - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I realised half my underpants were missing. In related news, my slob of a housemate hasn't washed hers in several weeks, and has been stealing mine. FML

#20699444
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45465) - you deserved it (3494)

On 06/01/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by WHOO HOO AIDS (woman) - Poland (Mazowieckie)

Today, my boyfriend of two years, whom I supported through the death of his father, and whose invalid mother I also took care of, suddenly dumped me. The fact that I've put on a little weight due to recent stress disgusts him, and he "can't date a chubster". FML

Today, I finished a big art project. It was a self-portrait done in acrylics. Proud of my piece, I showed my mom. After some thought her first comment was, "well, I'm either going to insult your art or your face." FML

#20698927
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47055) - you deserved it (4674)

On 06/01/2013 at 7:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

#20698818
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85333) - you deserved it (5840)

On 06/01/2013 at 3:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68355) - you deserved it (19348)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at karate, my sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML

#20698551
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59245) - you deserved it (4966)

On 06/01/2013 at 12:31am - health - by Mayyouneverfindpleasureinavagina (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad went snooping on my laptop, and saw that I'd recently looked up 2 Girls, 1 Cup. It was out of morbid curiosity, but he thinks I'm into "satanic porn", and confiscated every electronic device I own. Now I have to sneak to the library just to check my emails. FML

#20697878
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37222) - you deserved it (13766)

On 05/31/2013 at 6:42pm - misc - by nbj10 (man) - Singapore

Today, my very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that my boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML

#20696605
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57082) - you deserved it (3294)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:20am - love - by wtf mom - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend "finally figured out" that he couldn't possibly be the father of my child, and publicly broke up with me. When I reminded him that I was already pregnant when we first met, he "extra" broke up with me for making him look stupid. FML

#20696470
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47153) - you deserved it (6980)

On 05/30/2013 at 11:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be funny to go to the Apple store and log me on to Facebook on every single computer. FML

#20695876
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46071) - you deserved it (8650)

On 05/30/2013 at 7:06pm - love - by Terminator101101 - United States (Nevada)

Today, we had a get together for work at a restaurant I've never heard of. After spending all week trying to make a good impression on my new boss and co-workers, I showed up in a pair of shorts and a Star Wars T-Shirt. Turns out it was one of the fanciest restaurants in town. FML

#20695797
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19196) - you deserved it (48061)

On 05/30/2013 at 6:32pm - work - by Lizzie - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found shit on my windshield. I'm not sure if it is human or animal, but it was conveniently smeared all over and even more was placed under my wipers just in case I used them to clean it up. This isn't the first time, and I have no idea who I could have pissed off. FML

#20694826
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48657) - you deserved it (4114)

On 05/30/2013 at 5:41am - misc - by windshitwipers (man) - United States (Colorado)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: