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BarryMacockiner's FML badges
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
BarryMacockiner's favorite FMLs
by Christian / 09/28/2013 at 11:21am / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 12:08am / United States (Ohio) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 12:02am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to a really important job interview. During it, I accidentally let out a burp, came down with nervous hiccups, and when I tried to quietly ease out some painful gas that was building up, it came out as a massive, rancid fart. I'll definitely be unemployed for a while yet. FML
by ;_;" / 09/27/2013 at 5:33pm / Lebanon (Beyrouth) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML
by propose_you_freakin_coward / 09/27/2013 at 8:51am / Singapore / Love
by ihatethisjob / 09/27/2013 at 4:18am / United States (Michigan) / Work
Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML
by drinkdrankdrunk / 09/27/2013 at 3:33am / Canada (Alberta) / Love
Today, I went in the diner I always pass by and ordered a sandwich. When I asked how much it was, the waitress replied, "Don't worry, honey. We give free meals to the homeless on Thursdays." I was too ashamed to deny it, so I just said thank you and left. FML
by horriblefashionsense / 09/26/2013 at 11:20am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I learned that an antidepressant that works too well is a stimulant. I've been jittering and twitching like a meth-head, and my co-workers are asking when Jesse will be showing up with my "stuff". FML
by CancerFdMyLife / 09/26/2013 at 9:50am / United States (District of Columbia) / Health
by Anonymous / 09/25/2013 at 5:33pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by Bianchitis / 09/25/2013 at 11:07am / United States / Health
Today, I found out that the nice guy who comes to my workplace every morning to bring me a smoothie also makes a point of putting his knob in it before giving it to me. Also, all my coworkers knew about this and think it's hilarious. FML
by littledipper / 09/24/2013 at 11:51pm / United States (New York) / Work
Today, my ex-wife put my number on Craigslist as a gay fashion designer needing a one night stand. I only found out when I got a text from an unknown number asking me when was the last time I "ate a black anaconda". FML
by Craigslist is Evil. / 09/24/2013 at 2:12pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/24/2013 at 12:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I visited a new tattoo parlor, as my previous artist made me uncomfortable with his drunken,… Today, I met the man of my dreams. Hot, funny, smart, sensitive, he guesses at what I need before I… Today, as a freelancing musician, I had to pass on the best gig I've ever been offered (worth over…