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Barriaultcory's favorite FMLs
by fuckadaisical / 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm / United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff) / Intimacy
by OuchImAMoron / 11/28/2013 at 9:05pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by Thomas / 11/11/2013 at 12:20pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that when you flush an animal clear of blood for research, there is a nerve inside the heart, which when you strike it right, electrical signals cause the animal to writhe as if alive. Now, my boss knows about my fear of zombies, and I'm now terrified of half my job. FML
by kittkatt1 / 11/10/2013 at 8:52pm / United States (Michigan) / Work
Today, at work, I was taking a woman's measurements while she held her screaming baby. To silence the infant, she whipped out her breast right there and started feeding him. Moments later, he puked breast milk all over my desk. FML
by blargh / 10/03/2013 at 1:39pm / Russian Federation (Moscow City) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 7:44am / United States / Intimacy
by latter / 09/23/2013 at 8:05pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids
by msmidnight1965 / 09/22/2013 at 1:22pm / Canada / Kids
by drunkenloser / 09/20/2013 at 3:22am / United States / Health
by Anonymous / 09/20/2013 at 12:57am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by BarryShitpeas / 09/19/2013 at 11:18am / United Kingdom (Kent) / Health
Today, the Internet wasn't working. One girl decided to try to diagnose the problem. It said to connect the Ethernet cable. She started making fun of the computer for spelling "Internet" wrong. I'm graduating with this idiot in less than a month. FML
by Anonymous / 09/18/2013 at 10:57am / United States / Work
by OldHabitsDieHard / 09/18/2013 at 10:53am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
Today, I thought that an ingenious way to protest against high tuition prices would be to steal a box of soymilk from my university dining hall. The box exploded in my backpack. Not only did I lose all my soymilk, I now have replace my $120 calculator. FML
by Stupid / 09/18/2013 at 4:46am / United States (Missouri) / Money
Today, my grandparents came over for a family dinner. I'm somewhat overweight, and my grandma kept making sound effects in time with me doing pretty much anything. When I complained to my dad after she made a long farting sound as I sat down, he told me to suck it up. FML
by Anonymous / 09/13/2013 at 1:06pm / Ireland (Donegal) / Kids
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…