BananaN0se

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Offline (the 03/28/2016 at 8:37am)

BananaN0se

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 556
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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BananaN0se's page activity

Visits<b>awishadahbau5</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 9:13pm<b>BrainEaters</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 2:24am<b>ismedrage</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 2:56pm<b>aclark2523</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 2:13am<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 9:47pm<b>_Kiki_Donehue_</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 11:09pm<b>ItsKennyBaby</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 12:55pm<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 11:09am<b>Tomato_Cheese</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 11:55pm<b>EvilLittleMan</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 3:14am<b>Kjaerlighet</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 6:21pm<b>Shay_Shay97</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 8:21pm<b>littlemzobvious</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 6:51pm<b>Fritz_Rfunny1</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 4:11pm<b>constipation</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 10:42am<b>NutellaUnicorn</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 11:18am<b>thatnakedguy</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 4:48pm<b>Paulcs</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 9:24pm

Fucked!<b>thatnakedguy</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 10:48pm<b>terminator123456</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:19am

BananaN0se's FML badges

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Inception

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BananaN0se's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out the girl I met online, who I spent hours talking to every day for the past 2 months, and who I fell in love with is actually my gay roomate. He says if I could fall in love with "her", I can fall in love with him. It doesn't work that way, dickhead. FML

by Anonymous / 08/19/2015 at 2:32am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Love

Today, I went to a water park with a group of friends. As I went down the water slide, some complete turd waffle of a kid in the water kicked his leg out in line with my crotch. The moment I hit the bottom was the moment I think I became sterile. FML

by fuck kids / 06/06/2013 at 2:24pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, the battery cables on my car came loose, thus resetting my car's electronics to factory settings. The anti-theft system is now turned on, and I can't start my car with it on. Luckily, it turns off with a remote. The remote broke about six months ago. FML

Today, after sex, my boyfriend and I lay in bed for a couple of hours just chatting. This would have been lovely. However, his topic of choice for post-coital pillow talk was his theory about how Chewbacca is secretly the leader of the Rebel Alliance. It actually made sense. FML

by cl4ptp / 08/14/2012 at 8:17am / United Kingdom (Vale of Glamorgan, The) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my wife named our son after her ex boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2010 at 11:36pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I was watching TV with my grandpa, and he stopped flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote landed on my stomach as my mom and grandma walked in. They yelled at me for being a pervert for an hour, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML

by Andrew / 09/24/2010 at 6:22am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

by Embarressed... / 08/04/2010 at 6:25am / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy

Today, I was on the phone with my friend, when my four year old nephew came in, asking who I was talking to. I told him it was Santa Claus, so he insisted on talking to him. I handed over the phone and I hear, "Santa is fake. Grow up." I spent the next two hours with a screaming child proving Santa exists. FML

by stupidsantaclaus / 10/08/2009 at 1:14am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

by harrysolo / 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my crush came over and we began to fool around. He started to kiss my stomach, and just when I was getting into it, he pulled away with a disgusted look on his face, wiped his mouth, and said, "We'll continue this when you get rid of all your bellybutton lint." FML

by unlucky_number13 / 07/14/2009 at 5:41am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML

by Wmsys32pr9 / 03/30/2009 at 1:06am / United States (Washington) / Kids