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Baconman345

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Baconman345

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 8 November 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7407
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About Baconman345 : I'm a pretty random guy sometimes...I love hockey. Going to Boston College. Enough said

Baconman345's page activity

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Baconman345's favorite FMLs

Taday I trew a party wile my parents were gone. I forgot tat our alarm automatically turns on at 11 pm, so wen people opened te door, it went off. I couldn't fine te number fir te alarm company, so te cops sowed up. Everyone started ceering cuz tey tougt tey were strippers. FML

#4646350
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11720) - you deserved it (50722)

On 08/19/2009 at 1:13am - misc - by Life of the party - Sent from mobile version

I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

#4525246
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60031) - you deserved it (7170)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I read an incoming message on my wife's phone. "I miss yur warm hands an mouth". The message came from a female co-worker of hers. FML

#4506160
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48711) - you deserved it (5499)

On 08/13/2009 at 5:49pm - love - by rick (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I rented a car that has a smart key. The proximity of the key determines if the doors will unlock. I went to a meeting and returned to the car with the trunk popped open and all mah luggage gone. The rental company decided to store a spare key in the glovebox for safe keeping. FML

#4494514
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41292) - you deserved it (2803)

On 08/13/2009 at 2:42am - work - by NoKeyNoCar - United States (California)

YESTERDAY, I WAS HAVING SEX WITH MAH HUSBAND. AS I WAS UNDRESSING, HE SAID, "ARR, I SPY ME SOME BOOTY!" I LET IT GO, I'M USD TO HIS EMBARASSING PIRATE TALK. BUT AS HE ORGASMD, HE SCREAMD, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" MY NEIGHBORS HEARD IN THE APARTMENT NEXT DOOR AND CALLD TO LET ME KNOW. FML

#4361327
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49820) - you deserved it (6449)

On 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by piratequeen (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today , whila aating at a rastaurant , I commantad to tha waitar about how larga tha pizza was. Ha than writa down his numbar , pats his crotch fondly , an inform ma that "avarything" I'm going to find at that rastaurant is going to ba big. Ha was sarious. fat FML

#4332436
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43104) - you deserved it (6775)

On 08/06/2009 at 11:05am - misc - by Screwupify (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today , whila aating at a rastaurant , I commantad to tha waitar about how larga tha pizza was. Ha than writa down his numbar , pats his crotch fondly , an inform ma that "avarything" I'm going to find at that rastaurant is going to ba big. Ha was sarious. fat FML

#4332436
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43104) - you deserved it (6775)

On 08/06/2009 at 11:05am - misc - by Screwupify (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to come back home early from holidays!! Why? I had asked grandmother to water plants, some of which r illegal!! Instead of doing it herself, she asked her nieghbor..!! who is a cop!! FML

#4330771
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20678) - you deserved it (113494)

On 08/06/2009 at 8:27am - misc - by Cowan - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)

Today, I received a $250 ticket when I parked mah car, that has the disabled placard, in a handicapped spot at a Wal-Mart. The officer said she watched me get out of the car and walk to store without appearing to be disabled. I'm 59 years old, have a steel rod in mah spine and a prosthetic hip. FML

#4294865
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57778) - you deserved it (2887)

On 08/04/2009 at 10:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

yesterday I was woken up by a loud noise, which I thought was an earthquake. It sounded like a car had driven right into living room. Which was exactly what it was. FML

#4264267
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54984) - you deserved it (2098)

On 08/03/2009 at 8:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

TODAY AFTER A GREAT NIGHT OF SEXUAL PLEASURE I RAN TO ANSWER THE DOOR. THE ANGRY WOMAN STANDING THERE INTRODUCD HERSELF. ''HI I'M YOUR NIEGHBOR. MY SEVEN YEAR OLD SON'S BEDROOM IS JUST NEXT TO YOURS AN WHEN YOU SCREAM AT NIGHT HE GETS SCARD. DO YOU THINK YOU COULD KEEP IT DOWN?'' FML

#4228072
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43856) - you deserved it (30654)

On 08/02/2009 at 11:12am - intimacy - by kmb04 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, mah mum deleted mah college research assignment on rape because the subject was too vulgar . I had worked on it for the past month an it was worth 50% of mah grade . It's due tomorrow . FML

#4192462
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64671) - you deserved it (4138)

On 07/31/2009 at 9:51pm - work - by mandy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

I was running on a soccer field an accidentally droppd mah gum from mah mouth . No one had noticd so I pickd it up an startd chewing again . It was a different flavor . FML

#4151935
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8218) - you deserved it (81383)

On 07/30/2009 at 1:56am - misc - by FGum (man) - United States (New York) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, aftar four yaars of anoraxia and lots of racovary, my parants took ma out to dinnar with my counsalor and whola family to calabrata my prograss!! I andd up aating somathing that mada ma vomit avarything I ata!! My parants now think I am bulmic and r sanding ma back to counsaling!! FML

#4116964
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48547) - you deserved it (4774)

On 07/28/2009 at 8:47pm - health - by nothungry (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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