About Back_In_Action : So many idiots, so little time...
I like music, playing Pokemon and washing dishes.
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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
Today, I was complaining to my roommate that I never get asked out. Then, at work, a mentally challenged man left me his phone number on his pay ticket. Well, I guess I can't complain about never getting asked out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12118) - you deserved it (4984)
On 02/19/2010 at 12:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my little sister walked in on me and my boyfriend. I told her I would give her 10$ if she just pretended it never happened. She agreed, walked out and shut the door. Later, when my parents arrived, she yells: "Nicole and Joe were naked upstairs!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (16195) - you deserved it (13276)
On 02/19/2010 at 12:31am - kids - by ohemgee23 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for half an hour. The entire time, a man I had gone on a date with and that had gotten very out of hand with, was sitting in the car next to me. I noticed, panicked, and tried to drive off, rear-ending the car in front of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3639) - you deserved it (16967)
On 02/19/2010 at 12:13am - misc - by Skankeriffic (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, a picture fell off of the wall in the middle of the night. It hit me smack bang in the middle of face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15927) - you deserved it (2398)
On 02/18/2010 at 9:22am - health - by Hayleey_079 (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13077) - you deserved it (3615)
On 02/14/2010 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by klsdhjla (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33383) - you deserved it (2611)
On 01/22/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by Funnymann - United States
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20496) - you deserved it (3647)
On 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by scubai (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (54598) - you deserved it (12512)
On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (96952) - you deserved it (8076)
On 05/14/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Flicker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I went on somewhat of a blind date. The date was OK until he tried to spoon feed me. This didn't go over so well. Later, I noticed a strange looking brief case he was carrying. I asked him what it was and he whipped out 5 yoyos and did a yoyo show in the middle of the restaurant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52249) - you deserved it (4636)
On 04/22/2009 at 1:24am - misc - by 11321 (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (177830) - you deserved it (61438)
On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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