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BTF989

Offline (the 08/11/2014 at 4:10pm) | Search for a member

BTF989

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1564
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About BTF989 : I am a pirate.

BTF989's page activity

Visits<b>Flendre_scarlet</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 9:37am<b>gogators941</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:43pm<b>imbatmanfir</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 8:27pm<b>hxnnxh</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 5:28pm<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 5:19pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 10:38pm<b>TaylorWhiteGirl</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 6:50pm<b>Role448</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 12:42pm<b>awiseman</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:31pm<b>xHoiHoi</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 5:40pm<b>Chixxapow</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 11:09pm<b>shudson186</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:23am<b>notabeachbabe</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 11:13am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 6:38am<b>heythisisme02</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 12:25am<b>BFons</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 9:44am<b>savvy8</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 12:31pm<b>EndOfSekrets</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 1:03am

BTF989's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of BTF989's badges

BTF989's favorite FMLs

Today, I poured my heart out to my now ex-girlfriend over the recent passing away of my grandmother. Her eyes glazed over multiple times, and when I said that I don't know how to cope with everything, her advice was simply, "Shotgun. Mouth. Blam." FML

#20766944
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50035) - you deserved it (4699)

On 07/06/2013 at 12:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Lithuania (Vilniaus Apskritis)

Today, my daughter asked me to get her razors. When my 19-year-old son saw them he asked what they were for, to which my daughter replied, "For my armpits." My son then said, "Girls don't grow armpit hair." FML

#20764467
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45022) - you deserved it (6342)

On 07/05/2013 at 12:59am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked into the living room, only to find my brother wanking off to an episode of My Little Pony. FML

#20726036
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61433) - you deserved it (6108)

On 06/14/2013 at 6:29pm - intimacy - by bestiality, not even once (woman) - Ireland (Waterford)

Today, I took a dump in the woods at a secluded lake. I used the leaves of a seemingly harmless tree to clean myself. However, I was unaware that the leaf was poisonous. It feels like a thousand hornets are attacking my ass-crack. FML

#20705435
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32759) - you deserved it (48025)

On 06/04/2013 at 1:15pm - health - by poisonivyretard (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was texting my boyfriend when he said, "Hold up." Thinking it'd be funny, I ran and grabbed my copy of the movie Up, and took a picture of me holding it and sent it to him. He replied, "Getting real tired of your shit." Then dumped me for my "dumb taste in humor." FML

#20696601
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62481) - you deserved it (13655)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:16am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, I had to eat up a few specks of toilet paper to avoid spoiling "the moment" with my girlfriend. FML

#20692661
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63649) - you deserved it (14008)

On 05/29/2013 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I borrowed my boyfriend's laptop. Out of curiosity, I clicked through the bookmarks in his web browser. One of them took me to a site dedicated to sex stories featuring characters from My Little Pony. FML

#20687700
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42319) - you deserved it (16676)

On 05/26/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by bestiality? do I look like a pig? (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML

#20667250
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73191) - you deserved it (6149)

On 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by need € for new iron (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I registered on an irritable bowel support group, unknowingly linking it to my Facebook wall. FML

#20666712
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37452) - you deserved it (9981)

On 05/16/2013 at 6:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML

#20662485
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98358) - you deserved it (5968)

On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML

#20637584
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69893) - you deserved it (7856)

On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my psycho and now ex-girlfriend accused me of cheating on her with my own mother. FML

#20625307
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53959) - you deserved it (3565)

On 04/27/2013 at 2:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Lithuania (Kauno Apskritis)

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32710) - you deserved it (111930)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

#20566988
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20358) - you deserved it (51090)

On 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by fuck you dad (man) - Ireland (Monaghan)

Today, for the sixth time in a row, I was driving my kid to school and he made me late for work. Why? He was whacking off instead of getting ready. FML

#20551973
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43749) - you deserved it (6098)

On 03/20/2013 at 7:07am - intimacy - by Why son, why? (man) - United States



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