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BMTHsuperfan

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BMTHsuperfan
  • Town/Country : Norcal, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 June 1998 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 9327
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About BMTHsuperfan : Hey my name is Morgan(: Bi and Gemini. I enjoy laughing at other people's misfortunes. Message me for more info if you wish. I promise I don't bite. Unless you're into that sort of thing.
Follow me on Tumblr @sinful-mermaid

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BMTHsuperfan's favorite FMLs

Today, I marched in the St. Patrick's day parade. My horn has an inconveniently-placed spit valve that has to be drained frequently. At the end, I discovered every time I emptied it, it would spray all over the front of my pants. I marched an entire parade looking like I pissed my pants. FML

#21089223
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32358) - you deserved it (4548)

On 03/17/2014 at 5:48pm - misc - by Bandking (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized I'm so scared of my manager that I don't even dare to quit my job. The same job I want to quit exactly because I'm so scared of her. FML

Today, my roommate's extremely loud and obnoxious alarm went off six times, waking me up each time, before she finally gave up on hitting the snooze button and went back to sleep for good. FML

#21089097
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33354) - you deserved it (3224)

On 03/17/2014 at 3:07pm - misc - by IMAWAKE - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to appear in court. My boyfriend gave me a chocolate to eat for comfort. The quote on the wrapper read "Today, you are exactly where you should be." FML

#21089044
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34728) - you deserved it (5420)

On 03/17/2014 at 2:18pm - misc - by NotInTheRightPlace (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had an elaborate fantasy of what I would do if I became a cat and how I would make my way to my crush's house to be their cat. FML

Today, my dad told me that I can't wear leggings on Friday nights, because, "your butt is too distracting for my poker buddies." FML

Today, I was babysitting my nephew and we decided to color together. He drew a picture of someone who looked dead, almost zombie-like, while everyone else looked pretty normal. When I asked who it was, he said in a serious, scary voice, "It's you." FML

#21088838
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33419) - you deserved it (3189)

On 03/17/2014 at 5:51am - kids - by BondingTime - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while I thought I'd never had an orgasm, my doctor informed me that I'm actually having orgasms almost every time I have sex. They just feel like utterly frustrating, slightly painful, unpleasurable and completely unsatisfying muscle contractions. FML

Today, a lady who works for my husband confided in me that they've been sleeping with each other and now she's pregnant. She didn't know I was his wife. FML

Today, I found out what it feels like to be slapped in the face with a potted cactus. FML

#21088237
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39931) - you deserved it (5220)

On 03/16/2014 at 3:28pm - health - by thanksdad (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I waited on a gentleman and his lady friend at my restaurant. They ordered some of the most expensive items on the menu, and I thought I'd get a nice tip. Instead, he tipped me a scrap of paper, containing a drawing of a cock jizzing on a caricature of my face, and the word "Thanks." FML

#21088206
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40223) - you deserved it (3289)

On 03/16/2014 at 2:53pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked into my elderly client's home for my first day of work. I was immediately hit in the eye with something small, and had to get medical attention for a scratched cornea. It turns out my client likes to clip his toenails right by his front door. FML

#21088031
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36829) - you deserved it (2756)

On 03/16/2014 at 10:00am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was walking and saw a quarter. I bent down to pick it up. Barely a foot ahead there was another, so I crawled over to get it. This continued for about six feet when I realize a kid was laying them out in a trail. I had collected 7 fake quarters and the kid had it on video. FML

#21087786
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38105) - you deserved it (18135)

On 03/15/2014 at 11:46pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after leaving my workplace, I realized that I forgot some important work papers. When I went back to get them, I was faced with the sight of my boss and a coworker getting it on against my desk. FML

#21087500
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42220) - you deserved it (3263)

On 03/15/2014 at 6:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I followed my wife out, since she's been acting strangely lately and I was suspicious. She met up with a guy at a restaurant, who she later claimed was her brother. Either she's cheating on me, or it's tradition in her family to make out and grope each other at the end of meals. FML

#21087493
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53874) - you deserved it (4099)

On 03/15/2014 at 5:48pm - love - by broken vows (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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