About BMTHsuperfan : Hey my name is Morgan(: Bisexual, Gemini, junior in high school. My current job is devouring older men. I enjoy laughing at other people's misfortunes. Message me for more info if you wish. I promise I don't bite. Unless you're into that sort of thing.
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BMTHsuperfan's favorite FMLs
by 4evalone / 11/01/2014 at 1:59am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I dressed up as my friend for Halloween. He has a very distinct style and I thought my costume was pretty clever. When he saw me, he said he had never been so offended in his entire life, and now I feel like a complete asshole. FML
by Anonymous / 11/01/2014 at 1:47am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was a pregnant man for Halloween. Everyone at school thought it was funny, except my principal, who gave me a detention and said it was, "inappropriate and making a pregnant teacher feel uncomfortable". That pregnant teacher asked me to take a selfie with her. FML
by anonymous / 10/31/2014 at 7:28pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
by peanutprobs / 10/31/2014 at 5:12pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Health
by facebookdeception / 10/31/2014 at 12:25am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love
by OfficeFatty / 10/29/2014 at 10:41pm / United States / Work
by lexigan4 / 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm / United Kingdom / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/29/2014 at 1:06pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by fired tomoz / 10/29/2014 at 11:46am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Work
Today, I watched as the teenage neighbor girl tried to parallel-park between me and my wife's cars. She was doing pretty well until she backed into mine, got scared, hit the accelerator and ran into my wife's. FML
by carless / 10/29/2014 at 11:24am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I wanted to spice things up in the bedroom with my husband, so I set up some Halloween torches to create a wild ambiance. Unfortunately our dickhead neighbours saw the glow, didn't remember that fire tends to give off smoke, and called the fire department on us. FML
by BurnedDown / 10/28/2014 at 4:45pm / United Kingdom (East Riding of Yorkshire) / Intimacy
Today, I went to a first aid training course. I had to lie on the floor and pretend I was unconscious. We were supposed to be doing the recovery position, but the guy I was working with decided to perform CPR instead and grope my boobs in the process. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2014 at 2:35pm / United Kingdom / Work
by not drunk / 10/28/2014 at 2:04pm / Brazil (Rio Grande do Sul) / Health
by bottombarrel / 10/28/2014 at 10:07am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boss asked about the mass of deep scratches on my arm. I lied and told him it happened while I was trying to save my cat from a tree. Truth is, my cat is a sadistic asshole who stalks me and mauls me whenever he can. FML
by thewrittenrebel / 10/28/2014 at 3:40am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Animals
- Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, with whom I am genuinely in love. Right… Today, my boyfriend actually held onto my love handles while we were having sex. He said they "made… Today, I had hooked up with this girl and had finally lulled her asleep. I didn't want to stay so I…