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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10387) - you deserved it (31251)
On 06/06/2012 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by Rob (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21644) - you deserved it (4400)
On 05/22/2012 at 1:05am - intimacy - by chchboy (man) - United States
Today, I brought my boyfriend home, and I introduced him to my parents. Afterwards, I took him to my room so we could have some "bonding" time. Right as things got pretty intense, I heard my dad yell, "Stop faking, honey." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8206) - you deserved it (19614)
On 05/18/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by iris (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)
Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36989) - you deserved it (3014)
On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)
Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36989) - you deserved it (3014)
On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)
Today, I brought my girlfriend home while my parents were at work, and things got a little heated. We lost track of time, because the next thing we knew, my dad burst into the living room. He doubled over laughing and asked how much I paid her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19826) - you deserved it (3799)
On 05/08/2012 at 4:46pm - intimacy - by mal (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, I found the best cure for constipation is having my brother scare the literal shit out of me, in Walmart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17074) - you deserved it (1733)
On 04/26/2012 at 1:29pm - health - by crazyk2468 (man) - United States (California)
Today, I found out the bed I sleep in is the bed I was conceived in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28757) - you deserved it (2216)
On 04/22/2012 at 8:17am - intimacy - by Capteen (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33509) - you deserved it (2675)
On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon
Today, I found out my boyfriend and I have more in common than I thought. We both are sexually attracted to men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32798) - you deserved it (2284)
On 04/18/2012 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by caitlinz5 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (13284) - you deserved it (34150)
On 04/12/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by girly (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my ex, who I'm still in love with, emailed me. I thought she changed her mind about us, so I poured my heart out to her. She just wanted to let me know she has chlamydia, and advise me to go to the clinic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19940) - you deserved it (2992)
On 04/11/2012 at 7:05pm - health - by clinictime - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6749) - you deserved it (21853)
On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)
Today, I read an article with tips on how to give girls full-body orgasms and I decided to test a few on my girlfriend. Instead of having a mind-blowing orgasm, she started cackling and said I looked like a giraffe trying to bob for apples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15222) - you deserved it (3670)
On 03/26/2012 at 4:56pm - intimacy - by JC (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I read an article with tips on how to give girls full-body orgasms and I decided to test a few on my girlfriend. Instead of having a mind-blowing orgasm, she started cackling and said I looked like a giraffe trying to bob for apples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15222) - you deserved it (3670)
On 03/26/2012 at 4:56pm - intimacy - by JC (man) - United States (Missouri)
Monday 20 May 2013
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