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AwkwardShoe

Offline (the 02/23/2014 at 12:24am) | Search for a member

AwkwardShoe

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 7 February 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 145
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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AwkwardShoe's page activity

Visits<b>superwolf33</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 4:21pm<b>Aquaman911</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 12:18pm<b>jdf2</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:41pm<b>GeekyGeese</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 6:21pm<b>origamidragon</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:52am<b>MlleCerise</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 7:04am<b>greencurtains74</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 10:03pm<b>rybaby23</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 7:59pm<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 2:24am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 11:47am<b>XcuzimsotiredX</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 6:53am<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 6:01am<b>nightstrike3</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 10:00pm<b>clapdatassidy</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 2:58am<b>Secret_Ninjaa</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 9:54am<b>Darkestsoul</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 3:35am<b>z0mBi3kiTTy</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 7:13pm

AwkwardShoe's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of AwkwardShoe's badges

AwkwardShoe's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife was putting her finger in my bellybutton and making overly sexual noises. I thought this was all fun and games until I realized she was actually into this. FML

#21209385
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42718) - you deserved it (5080)

On 07/14/2014 at 11:25pm - intimacy - by thedoc (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked outside to find my 3 year old daughter and her pet fish playing together on the swings. FML

#21203004
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39214) - you deserved it (4829)

On 07/08/2014 at 3:55pm - animals - by Jack00412 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51845) - you deserved it (4562)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my coworker was telling me about his mom, when he asked about mine. I told him that I've never met my mom, because she died during my childbirth. It's a very painful subject for me, but all the same, my coworkers have decided they'll now only address me as "Tyrion". FML

#21178277
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43195) - you deserved it (4102)

On 06/17/2014 at 4:30pm - misc - by the lannisters send their retards - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my roommate's pets conspired against me. "The dog ate my homework" has apparently become too clichéd for them. The new excuses are, "My cat chewed through my laptop power cable" and "the gecko ate my pen drive." FML

#21171341
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40366) - you deserved it (4394)

On 06/11/2014 at 8:00pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

#21171240
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44798) - you deserved it (6811)

On 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML

#21169063
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50286) - you deserved it (10866)

On 06/10/2014 at 12:02am - love - by MiserableMan (man) - Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh)

Today, I let my dog outside to play. He shat on three cars, played dead in the middle of the street, and chased my neighbors' cat into a pool. When he came back into the house, he had a note taped to his back saying "IOU 1 lawsuit". FML

Today, I was spinning some yarn around to make my new cat run in circles. After about 10 seconds, he stopped going in circles and went straight ahead, happily running several feet into the wall and knocking himself out. My bowel movements have more brain-power than this thing. FML

#21168476
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34784) - you deserved it (8478)

On 06/09/2014 at 5:45pm - animals - by jaqen h'garrrhghhgfgjhfuck (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, some pig slapped my ass as he passed me in the street, then looked back at me with a dirty grin. His grin turned to horror when he realized that I'm actually a guy, then to anger as he bitched me out for "tricking" him by "looking like a chick". FML

#21167190
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56163) - you deserved it (6778)

On 06/08/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by 404: sense not found (man) - United States (California)

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

#21154464
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46489) - you deserved it (5577)

On 05/28/2014 at 10:21am - love - by needanotherbed - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, thanks to my phone's shitty predictive text combined with me being half-asleep, I accidentally offered my heartbroken buddy "oral support" if he ever needs it. FML

#21151390
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44501) - you deserved it (8784)

On 05/25/2014 at 5:23pm - intimacy - by whoops (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I baked a strawberry cake and I didn't have any fresh strawberries for garnish, so I used a can of strawberry pie filling. My neighbors said it looked like the cake was taken from the dumpster behind an abortion clinic. FML

#21146042
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40951) - you deserved it (8053)

On 05/20/2014 at 5:54am - misc - by sothishappened (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my cat decided to hide in the garbage can so he could get a free trip outside, but was too fat to climb all of the way inside of it. He got stuck half-way in. It took me ten minutes to get him out. FML

Today, I had a wonderful dream where I got married to the perfect guy, then had the best sex of my life on a beautiful honeymoon. The only problem is that my "husband" was the snowman from Frozen, and that I got sad when I realized it was just a dream. FML

#21142020
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41831) - you deserved it (8921)

On 05/16/2014 at 5:07pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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