Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Avoriginies

Offline (the 08/27/2015 at 7:54pm) | Search for a member

Avoriginies

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 26 July 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5516
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Avoriginies's page activity

Visits<b>Mons</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 6:18am<b>Illuminati_</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 5:40pm<b>wheresmymary</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 8:12pm<b>_delaneybear</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 12:54am<b>Tymaster5</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 1:59am<b>Johnatron</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 5:23pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 8:01pm<b>Decepticus</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 4:17am<b>LOLgasmic123</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 5:42am<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 3:03pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 10:16pm<b>vanessuhm</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 12:13pm<b>Taytochill23</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 3:50pm<b>randomshuffle369</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 9:36pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 7:34am

Avoriginies's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Avoriginies's badges

Avoriginies's favorite FMLs

Today, I didn't mind paying a little bit extra for my manicure because I forgot how nice it was to have someone hold your hand. Even if it was an old Asian lady. FML

#20581665
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34908) - you deserved it (5374)

On 04/09/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by lonelygirl (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a pregnant friend who is due in 2 weeks posted a picture of a baby on Facebook. I commented congratulations. She's still pregnant. It was a picture of her baby who died 3 years ago. FML

#20553352
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52326) - you deserved it (12392)

On 03/21/2013 at 5:42am - kids - by seamonkeys - United States

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

#20537010
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21911) - you deserved it (62205)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

#20523671
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46351) - you deserved it (5774)

On 02/26/2013 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by Frostbitten (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39477) - you deserved it (10410)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he found out my birthday is the same day as his, and he thinks we are twins who were separated at birth. FML

#20505216
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42789) - you deserved it (3277)

On 02/13/2013 at 5:09pm - love - by okay then (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML

#20489402
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61137) - you deserved it (3770)

On 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by thoughtidseenitall (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML

#20484951
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32352) - you deserved it (4580) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by jay ze punk - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, a four-year-old said a word that I didn't know the meaning of. I had to look up the definition. FML

#20465228
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16352) - you deserved it (34737)

On 01/17/2013 at 9:31pm - kids - by walkingdictionary - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the girl of my dreams asked me if I wanted to go biking with her. "Just the two of us," she said. I had to turn her down because I'm 17 years old and never learned how to ride a bike. FML

#20457168
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26929) - you deserved it (36108)

On 01/13/2013 at 1:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me he wanted to learn Korean before Spanish. Apparently, being able to sing along to Gangnam Style is more important to him than being able to speak with my family. FML

#20453278
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37025) - you deserved it (7121)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:24am - love - by Latina (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

#20423881
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42775) - you deserved it (5023)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, because my boyfriend drives a 2-seated sports car, I had to awkwardly sit on his brother's lap as we drove to the store. I soon felt a poking sensation through his pants, just a few minutes before we hit a bumpy road. FML

#20414298
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49039) - you deserved it (6196)

On 12/22/2012 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by orgasmicriding (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my daughter had the words "Always classy, never trashy" tattooed across her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML

#20400337
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34400) - you deserved it (3588)

On 12/15/2012 at 3:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

#20194616
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31482) - you deserved it (5851)

On 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: