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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (77990) - you deserved it (4456)
On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)
Today, I learned if you type my full name in Google Images, the 3rd thing that comes up is a naked woman in ropes. Someone on Pornhub thought it was smart to comment that the girl looks just like me. She does. Now my parents think I'm a porn star, and most people at school stopped talking to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44669) - you deserved it (3095)
On 05/14/2013 at 12:15am - intimacy - by magomag (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, while doing a fun genetics game in Biology, I found out that I was adopted. Turns out the game wasn't so fun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46828) - you deserved it (2369)
On 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML
I agree, your life sucks (53434) - you deserved it (7621)
On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53513) - you deserved it (5685)
On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my sister texted me, saying she was about to go into surgery. It's been a long time coming, and we've both been worried about what could happen. I texted "good luck" back. My phone autocorrected it to "goodbye" and I didn't even notice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47842) - you deserved it (6431)
On 05/02/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19842) - you deserved it (42739)
On 05/01/2013 at 2:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was getting ready, when I heard my dad in the shower. He was singing along to the song "The Wheel in the Sky" by Journey. Except he'd changed the lyrics and was singing, "The dick on this guy needs a rubbin'." It turns out my mom was in the shower with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47650) - you deserved it (3284)
On 05/01/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had yet another class with my psychotic, conservative, uber-religious teacher. The "well-known statistic" of today? Over 90% of people who have ever watched porn end up having a divorce due to psychological damage from said porn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34786) - you deserved it (4393)
On 04/29/2013 at 3:32am - intimacy - by WTHChristianSchool (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my dog became scared of his own food bowl. He now barks for ages every time he sees it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31080) - you deserved it (2407)
On 04/29/2013 at 3:20am - animals - by conbon123 - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was getting into the mood with my boyfriend. Ten minutes into it, I told him to "teach me a lesson." His response: "I ain't no teacher." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35621) - you deserved it (8758)
On 04/29/2013 at 3:08am - intimacy - by unforgettablee (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I confessed to cheating to my girlfriend. She decided to go up to the girl and ask her about it. The girl denied it and said she didn't even know me. My girlfriend walked up to me, called me a liar and punched me in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20236) - you deserved it (49286)
On 04/29/2013 at 1:26am - love - by bad day Brutus (man) - United States
Today, I summoned the courage to call my abusive mother-in-law about her non-payment of the money I stupidly lent her last year. She replied, "Why don't you go deepthroat a cactus, then we'll talk about it, cunt." and then hung up on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46790) - you deserved it (5754)
On 04/28/2013 at 4:44pm - money - by a tad whipped (man) - Australia
Today, I got caught masturbating, twice, by the same person. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25084) - you deserved it (55160)
On 04/28/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia
Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his buddies that the main reason he got into video game modding was so he could put a virtual version of me in his games and "shoot the fuck out of that bitch". FML
I agree, your life sucks (43903) - you deserved it (5666)
On 04/28/2013 at 1:32pm - love - by gibbette (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)
Monday 20 May 2013
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