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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 January 1978 (38 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 906
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Avocado_ : My name Chone Figgins'
I glad you dig!

Avocado_'s page activity

Visits<b>adamo_erebus</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 7:23pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:00am<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 02/12/2010 at 4:41pm<b>PurplePoet</b> - the 02/11/2010 at 11:01pm<b>Giant_Idiot</b> - the 11/11/2009 at 8:36pm<b>alexandraa</b> - the 11/05/2009 at 1:12am<b>Tamara2011</b> - the 10/28/2009 at 8:49pm<b>katherinebby17</b> - the 10/28/2009 at 2:27am<b>noidea</b> - the 10/25/2009 at 11:41am<b>Witchcraft</b> - the 10/22/2009 at 8:02pm<b>memillia</b> - the 10/22/2009 at 6:44pm<b>wtfismyfml</b> - the 10/17/2009 at 6:12pm<b>xCrackerx</b> - the 10/07/2009 at 7:35pm<b>Dr_Pepper</b> - the 09/24/2009 at 11:08pm<b>Kervik</b> - the 09/24/2009 at 12:10pm<b>surger1</b> - the 09/22/2009 at 4:41pm<b>poobumwee</b> - the 09/08/2009 at 4:53am<b>screwtaylor</b> - the 08/27/2009 at 8:53pm

Avocado_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Avocado_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I went to pick my date up at her house. When I got to the door, her dad answered. We talked for a little bit and he told me to take his 1958 Corvette. I politely refused and he told me, "If I can trust you with my daughter, I can trust you with my car." I crashed into his mailbox. FML

by Manstobe92 / 11/16/2009 at 2:32am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML

by Anonymous / 10/07/2009 at 7:12pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replies, "you farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2009 at 12:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that not only has my father been cheating on my mother with another woman, but they have a child together with the same name as me. FML

by redbluegreen / 08/09/2009 at 5:26am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was using a public bathroom when a woman backs in, pulls down her pants, and sits on my lap. Needless to say she didn't even notice I was there until I hyperventilated. FML

by yourmom / 06/16/2009 at 12:06am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML

by Scottrick / 03/01/2009 at 12:55pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids