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AutumnnNicolee

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AutumnnNicolee

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  • Number of visits : 24
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AutumnnNicolee's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up at 6am and went into the kitchen, where I saw a mouse in front of the fridge. Petrified, I stood in the doorway shooing it for a few minutes. My husband then walked into the kitchen, picked up the "mouse", and threw it in the bin. It was a used tea bag. FML

#20823044
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36994) - you deserved it (17805)

On 08/06/2013 at 12:01am - animals - by Tea_baggins (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML

#20817265
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56776) - you deserved it (5520)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by um... what the fuck, miss? (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I returned from a long business trip a day early to surprise my wife. She was sleeping, so I climbed into bed and started spooning her. Thinking I was an intruder, she simultaneously kicked me in the groin, elbowed me in the ribs, and smacked the back of her head into my jaw. FML

#20805942
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43509) - you deserved it (24588)

On 07/27/2013 at 4:03am - love - by good_aim (man) - United States (California)

Today, a co-worker verbally abused me because I yawned. His excuse was that, "It's contagious". FML

#20800837
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38272) - you deserved it (3950)

On 07/24/2013 at 5:15am - work - by CapNCook (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

#20731352
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68963) - you deserved it (3956)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while I was in the shower, my boyfriend decided to join me. We were really getting into it and he attempted to lift me up. Not only did I let out a massive fart, he slipped and fell on top of me. He won't stop laughing. FML

#20513159
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42978) - you deserved it (9378)

On 02/19/2013 at 3:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous -



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