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AutumnHerondale's favorite FMLs
Today, I woke up to the feeling of something crawling up my leg. I threw back the bed sheets and saw it was a cockroach. My dad said my ensuing scream was so girlish that he wondered what the hell my sister was doing in my bedroom. FML
by shat / 12/12/2015 at 2:14am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by ujellybro234 / 12/01/2015 at 11:52am / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, I went to the bowling alley. I have short, stubby fingers, and as I looked for a bowling ball that would fit my hand properly, an old man watched me searching, and approached asking, "Is that how you are with women? Fingering them, tossing them in the gutter, and looking for another?" FML
by weldingmachine217 / 11/16/2015 at 4:47pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/11/2015 at 6:03am / United States (New Hampshire) / Health
by lauziej93 / 11/10/2015 at 4:24am / Spain (La Rioja) / Work
by feeling single / 10/28/2015 at 3:48pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I woke up to the sound of footsteps outside my room. I investigated but found nothing. As I went back to my room, I heard a sort of giggling from inside. I was so scared, I grabbed my car keys, got the fuck out of there, and drove to my girlfriend's house in my pajamas. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2015 at 11:09am / United States / Miscellaneous
by FreeTacos_ / 10/28/2015 at 1:23am / United States (Colorado) / Love
by welp / 10/28/2015 at 12:11am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/24/2015 at 10:33pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous
by Walter / 10/23/2015 at 11:17pm / Spain / Intimacy
by PoorGal / 10/19/2015 at 2:04pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work
by Oh Cock / 10/10/2015 at 11:15am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/09/2015 at 5:06am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I found out my son told his teachers that I make his brother Tom sleep on the floor, make him stay out of the house for long periods of time, and don't let him use the toilet. Tom is actually our cat. FML
by Bad Mother / 10/08/2015 at 7:53am / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Animals
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…