Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Authoress14

Offline (the 10/06/2014 at 1:28pm) | Search for a member

Authoress14

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 14 June 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1327
  • Number of comments : 66
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Authoress14 : 22. Brooklyn. Inked. Tell it as it is. 'Nuff said

Authoress14's page activity

Visits<b>kudwafuuu</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 1:05am<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 9:19pm<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 2:30am<b>jillyanzen</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 12:50pm<b>Shenabina</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 5:11pm<b>ThenamesEevee</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 3:18am<b>savannah65</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 12:58am<b>captainObviously</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 4:01pm<b>sophieeanniee</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 9:15pm<b>warriorkitty_</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 7:52pm<b>Dream_Of_Waking</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 8:57am<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 11:14pm<b>Npinzon1994</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 10:53am<b>RadikulRam</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 2:45am<b>camsaltysquares</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 2:40am<b>ASaranap</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 12:44am<b>mcmuffinman1</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 11:44pm<b>UnknownDemon1406</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 11:20pm

Authoress14's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Authoress14's badges

Authoress14's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog became scared of his own food bowl. He now barks for ages every time he sees it. FML

#20629727
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36205) - you deserved it (3031)

On 04/29/2013 at 3:20am - animals - by conbon123 - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32745) - you deserved it (112111)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, I realized how tiny my apartment is, when I was able to vacuum from bedroom to bathroom through the living room without switching the power outlet from the one in the kitchen. I pay a fortune to live in this shoebox. FML

#20608013
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41557) - you deserved it (9394)

On 04/20/2013 at 4:22pm - money - by citylife - United States

Today, I can no longer leave my son at daycare, because at the age of 5, he's started manipulating the girls there into fighting over him. A kid lost a baby tooth in one such brawl. FML

#20607466
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49321) - you deserved it (6443)

On 04/20/2013 at 12:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Thailand

Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML

#20603007
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51460) - you deserved it (5958)

On 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML

#20599244
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49892) - you deserved it (8179)

On 04/17/2013 at 12:13pm - kids - by my dumb bro - United States (Arkansas)

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

#20582197
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47366) - you deserved it (4881)

On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I started training for a charity boxing match. When I got home and walked through the door, my dad punched me in the stomach to test my reaction time. As I lay on the floor trying to catch my breath, he said my reaction time was "terrible". FML

#20579242
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28843) - you deserved it (5319)

On 04/07/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by DJ (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was at University when a giant mascot started walking in my direction. As they walked past, they whispered my name seductively. I still don't know who it was. FML

#20578916
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36153) - you deserved it (4896)

On 04/07/2013 at 10:51am - work - by confused - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my little sister figured out how to use the printer. I came home to pictures of Nicolas Cage all over my room. FML

#20571278
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32524) - you deserved it (5268)

On 04/02/2013 at 5:22am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, at work I got in an elevator to go upstairs. It wasn't until the doors opened minutes later and people stepped in that I realized I had zoned out and forgot to press the button for the floor I needed. I then promptly exited the elevator and waited for the next elevator to go up in. FML

#20513703
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8508) - you deserved it (23012)

On 02/19/2013 at 5:03pm - work - by CaBur (man) - United States (California)

Today, I tripped while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reached out and grabbed onto one of the guys walking up. I ended up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgusted glares as I dusted myself off. FML

#20489268
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22644) - you deserved it (7121)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:53pm - health - by Awkward (man) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I finally found the courage to ask a guy I like out for a drink. He accepted, we drank, and when it came time to go home, I half-drunkenly left him my number. Once I got back home, I realized I'd actually given him my dad's number instead. FML

#20489080
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10857) - you deserved it (28705)

On 02/01/2013 at 2:59pm - love - by 3some? uh, no (woman) - Dominican Republic

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML

#20486562
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47737) - you deserved it (3569) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by dr mamour - Sent from mobile version

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45522) - you deserved it (5937) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • FML's Thanksgiving Special: TGS
  • As many of us know through popular culture, today is Thanksgiving in the US. Come on, we’ve all seen a TV show involving a Thanksgiving dinner or plans to do so that have gone awry due to one of the main…

Wednesday 26 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: