About Austin342 : Just a college kid who enjoys the laughs I get out of FMyLife
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YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I walked in on my son trying to carve a bong out of a watermelon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35350) - you deserved it (6064)
On 05/11/2013 at 12:21pm - kids - by What the fuck, son? (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I found out my husband has been talking to another woman on Facebook. His only defense was "I thought I deleted the messages." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18181) - you deserved it (1821)
On 09/01/2012 at 2:02am - love - by gmac0417 - United States
Today, I finally confronted my boyfriend and asked him if he was cheating on me. He got flustered and said, "Technically, I'm cheating with you, not on you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24361) - you deserved it (1762)
Today, I listened to my roommate and her friend struggle with their math homework for an hour. It wouldn't be so bad, except for the fact that I'm a math major and repeatedly offered my help. They'd rather fail math than be around me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17398) - you deserved it (1725)
On 08/29/2012 at 4:51pm - misc - by foreveralone.jpg (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, a homeless man tried to sell me a "magic, one-finger glove". It was a used condom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23286) - you deserved it (2003)
On 06/24/2012 at 10:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29506) - you deserved it (2878)
Today, I was out to coffee with an extremely attractive friend. A crazy man came up to the window we were facing. He took one look at her, then turned to me with a big, congratulatory smile, flashing me a thumbs-up. Then he turned to her, frowned disappointedly and gave a thumbs-down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16702) - you deserved it (1323)
On 06/14/2012 at 4:11am - misc - by offended (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML
I agree, your life sucks (22240) - you deserved it (2090)
On 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10316) - you deserved it (16441)
On 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17705) - you deserved it (176)
On 05/17/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by secret_source (woman) - United States
Today, not only did my boyfriend set my hair on fire, but he attempted to put it out by dumping bong water on my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16567) - you deserved it (7133)
On 05/16/2012 at 10:19am - love - by Coykoi - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17521) - you deserved it (5685)
Today, I was having dinner with my college friends to celebrate the end of our first year. I said really great things about them as individuals. The only thing they had to say to me was, "Thanks for being the token black friend." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17356) - you deserved it (1953)
On 05/14/2012 at 10:23pm - misc - by foreverbrown (man) - United States
Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (31304) - you deserved it (2939) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18801) - you deserved it (2620)
On 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)
Monday 20 May 2013
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