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Aspen_Grace33

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Aspen_Grace33

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2349
  • Number of comments : 140
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Aspen_Grace33 : 29 and living near St Louis, MO.

Aspen_Grace33's page activity

Visits<b>PhilosophyCat</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 4:01pm<b>netflixislove</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 10:29am<b>RA91</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 8:18am<b>FlamingColor</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 10:54pm<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 5:33pm<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 4:11pm<b>YepThatsMeee</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 1:13pm<b>lnheritance</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 3:15pm<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 10:23pm<b>papashaan</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 3:55pm<b>calvo_07</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 6:54pm<b>summer135790</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 11:59pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 7:43pm<b>nut3lla</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 4:47pm<b>Jet_Life55</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:35am<b>2ndtemplar</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:07am<b>jvsoccer23</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 6:09pm<b>SillehKat</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 5:33pm

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Aspen_Grace33's favorite FMLs

Today, after my shower, I went to clear off my fogged-up mirror. Doing so, I noticed a handprint on it. I compared it to my hand, but it was much too small. I live alone. FML

#21292770
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36325) - you deserved it (2413)

On 11/05/2014 at 3:44pm - misc - by spooked - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was shopping for a new deodorant, and this guy was standing in the way. He wouldn't move, so I crouched down to get the one I wanted, right when he did the most violent fart right in my face. Then his wife came over, made a face and he whispered, "I think that girl just farted". FML

#21290313
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35448) - you deserved it (3140)

On 11/02/2014 at 6:28am - health - by smellyhair - United Kingdom

Today, my dad vehemently refused to let me go on vacation to France with my best friend, because he watched Taken a few months ago and apparently forgot that it's just a movie. FML

#21287659
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31272) - you deserved it (3975)

On 10/29/2014 at 1:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32602) - you deserved it (4552)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mother locked me out of the house. Why? The dog and her needed some time to talk. FML

#21285216
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31353) - you deserved it (2372)

On 10/25/2014 at 8:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, let's just say it's not always a good idea to storm into your mum's bedroom after hearing several loud slaps accompanied by yelps. What sounds like domestic violence might just be your mum and step-dad's foreplay. For Christ's sake, I need brain bleach. FML

#21285126
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34628) - you deserved it (7754)

On 10/25/2014 at 5:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my 9-year-old daughter was acting out and wouldn't do her homework. I told her that if she didn't study, she wouldn't get her acceptance letter from Hogwarts. She looked into my eyes, straight through to my soul and said, "Hogwarts isn't real, retard." FML

#21280509
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34263) - you deserved it (12255)

On 10/18/2014 at 3:29pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML

#21267077
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32153) - you deserved it (3556)

On 09/28/2014 at 3:26pm - health - by jazzie7719 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35734) - you deserved it (3650)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40230) - you deserved it (5628)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39175) - you deserved it (9900)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on Facebook, only to see my grandpa had posted "feeling horny" with my grandma. FML

#21261512
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35996) - you deserved it (3373)

On 09/19/2014 at 10:27pm - misc - by failingdaily - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)



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