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Aspen_Grace33

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Aspen_Grace33

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1582
  • Number of comments : 135
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Aspen_Grace33 : 29 and living near St Louis, MO.

Aspen_Grace33's page activity

Visits<b>calvo_07</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 6:54pm<b>summer135790</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 11:59pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 7:43pm<b>nut3lla</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 4:47pm<b>Jet_Life55</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:35am<b>2ndtemplar</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:07am<b>jvsoccer23</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 6:09pm<b>SillehKat</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 5:33pm<b>motherfogkerr</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 4:21pm<b>dylanger16</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 1:34pm<b>Oihana</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 8:36am<b>GuessWut</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 7:40am<b>AviatOfficial</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 5:37am<b>HR_Baden</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 3:53am<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 3:02am<b>Rainb0wdash9</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 1:13am<b>Dynosaur_dollie</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:57am<b>SkittlesGoRawr</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:20am

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Aspen_Grace33's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34018) - you deserved it (6009)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38996) - you deserved it (12437)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, while on a tour bus, our guide told us that "Jimi Hendrix was like, uh, the Miley Cyrus of the '60s." I'm actually a committed pacifist, but I was already halfway out of my seat to choke the pimply-faced twat out before I managed to restrain myself. Now I'm scared of myself. FML

#21237562
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33936) - you deserved it (4941)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He smiled broadly and said "A porn star!" FML

#21237548
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36072) - you deserved it (5853)

On 08/14/2014 at 4:44pm - kids - by cahsecuel (woman) - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, after having multiple dreams where I have a daughter with my boyfriend, I'm now emotionally attached to a child who isn't real, and I get depressed when I can't be with her in real life. FML

#21237524
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34903) - you deserved it (7654)

On 08/14/2014 at 3:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36325) - you deserved it (22117)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my psychotic step-dad asked me if I'm doing drugs. I replied with a massive amount of sarcasm: "Yeah, all of 'em. Especially meth." He flipped out, searched my room top to bottom, then grounded me "for good" until I tell him where I hid the supposed drugs. FML

#21233273
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38969) - you deserved it (11650)

On 08/09/2014 at 1:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while I was working customer support, a lady hung up on me mid-sentence, and I trailed off, saying "…aaannnddd you hung up on me like a bitch." Turned out she was still on the line and had just accidentally hit mute. FML

#21232769
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23192) - you deserved it (35551)

On 08/08/2014 at 8:16pm - work - by suspended (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. 10 minutes in, I was so pissed off with the girl constantly repeating "You like that? Yeah?" and the cameraman's obsession with the guy's asscrack that I started yelling at the screen. Now I'm more stressed than ever. FML

#21232670
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35107) - you deserved it (11340)

On 08/08/2014 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by FUCK YOU (man) - United States

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

#21229613
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46471) - you deserved it (3677)

On 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

#21225641
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42354) - you deserved it (4352)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:38am - misc - by lostintdot (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML

#21219246
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41474) - you deserved it (21348)

On 07/24/2014 at 11:59am - misc - by FML - United States (Virginia)

Today, the fire alarm went off at work. My office is on the second floor, and the door to the stairs were jammed shut. The only way out was jumping out the window. The best part was breaking my leg due to someone burning their lunch. FML

#21218720
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42148) - you deserved it (7728)

On 07/23/2014 at 9:34pm - health - by timv94 (man) - United States (Kentucky)



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