[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

AsianHomie

Search for a member

AsianHomie
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 732
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

AsianHomie's last visitors

perdix

AsianHomie's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

AsianHomie's favorite FMLs

Today, I texted my girlfriend that I'm going to 'lick my professor's ass' instead of 'kick' due to auto-correction on my phone. FML

#8052532 (232)

I agree, your life sucks (8553) - you deserved it (15698)

On 02/09/2010 at 2:10pm - misc - by kingmetal42 - Sent from mobile version

Today, after months of trying, my wife of seven years told me she is finally pregnant. I'm going to be an uncle. FML

#7189298 (223)

I agree, your life sucks (48444) - you deserved it (2069)

On 01/06/2010 at 10:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had nothing better to do than make a penis out of silly putty. FML

#6315427 (86)

I agree, your life sucks (7207) - you deserved it (22930)

On 11/15/2009 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to the movies. Not only did the movie end up being awful, but I came to my car to find out someone drew Squidward from "SpongeBob" with large letters spelling "I LIKE POTATOES!" on my windshield. In permanent marker. FML

#6298224 (132)

I agree, your life sucks (20109) - you deserved it (1954)

On 11/14/2009 at 6:08am - misc - by squidwardpotatoes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that I was conceived during a conjugal visit. FML

#6089701 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (24492) - you deserved it (1800)

On 10/31/2009 at 8:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was paying for coffee and accidentally touched hands with the girl behind the counter. As I was walking home, I realised that was the closest I've been to getting laid in two years. FML

#5661847 (58)

I agree, your life sucks (14487) - you deserved it (2887)

On 10/05/2009 at 1:22pm - intimacy - by swedishguy (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, during our championship field hockey game, my mouthguard fell into a mass of geese poop. The referee made me put it back in my mouth. FML

#5451406 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (39134) - you deserved it (2914)

On 09/24/2009 at 6:10pm - work - by ewewew (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at work and was trying to cheer up my stressed out manager by chatting. We were on the subject of sleeping in when I told her that I loved to be lazy and sleep in when I could. She looked up and down me and then answered, "I can see that." FML

#5368634 (53)

I agree, your life sucks (20431) - you deserved it (7234)

On 09/20/2009 at 8:03am - work - by Lazy (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I visited home. My drunk mother was screaming to my drunk stepdad about a fight four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "Orgasm face." And the neighbors were dancing outside coked out and naked. FML

#5344643 (255)

I agree, your life sucks (56726) - you deserved it (2967)

On 09/19/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt - right by my left nipple. Absentmindedly, I licked my finger and tried rubbing the stain out. When I looked up, the Vice President was staring at me in disbelief. FML

#5110537 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (26923) - you deserved it (4322)

On 09/07/2009 at 6:19pm - work - by CMANIA (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my friends and I went to the beach and we were tanning when I suddenly saw 10 roses floating in the ocean. I went around to pick up all the roses and threw the petals at my friends. Then I notice a big boat of people in black and white were looking at me with disgust. It was a funeral. FML

#5087791 (133)

I agree, your life sucks (11485) - you deserved it (33445)

On 09/06/2009 at 7:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was curious as to whether or not my mom was off of her medication. When I asked her, she pulled a knife on me. Looks like I got my answer. FML

#4905255 (75)

I agree, your life sucks (38278) - you deserved it (2982)

On 08/29/2009 at 12:46pm - health - by mommy_issues (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, for my birthday, my mom presented me with a $4,000 check to pay for my braces. I've been very self-conscious about my teeth for years. Everyone applauded and told me how happy they were for me. Later, my mom asked me for the check back. Apparently it was just meant to make her look good. FML

#4859599 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (53472) - you deserved it (1475)

On 08/27/2009 at 1:23pm - money - by crookedteeth (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I punched the air enthusiastically after getting an impossible question right. Unfortunately, above me was an old fashioned mole trap, with 6 small spikes and 2 large ones. I now have 6 puncture wounds in my hand, and two in my shoulder, as it fell off the hook it was hanging on. FML

#4746647 (133)

I agree, your life sucks (16453) - you deserved it (4868)

On 08/22/2009 at 10:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, it was my birthday. My parents came into my room at 12:01 to surprise me. Do you know what fifteen year olds do at midnight? FML

#4734669 (415)

I agree, your life sucks (34961) - you deserved it (15872)

On 08/22/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by urmommmm (man) - United States (New York)