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ArcticDead's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
ArcticDead's favorite FMLs
by polkadotpinup / 09/16/2016 at 1:22pm / United States (Arizona) / Work
by bigbaby / 09/16/2016 at 3:06am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, I called a cab to get me and my cat home from the vet. After a 40 minute wait and three calls to the taxi company, the operator told me that the driver she sent to my location just confirmed that he already has a woman with my name and a cat in his car. FML
by Rabite / 09/15/2016 at 10:48am / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Transportation
Today, I was on a business trip with a co-worker. We had to wait for the train, so I decided to browse a store in the train station while he waited outside. I then got a message on my cell phone, from my co-worker saying, "You are somewhere on this train, right?" FML
by Rabite / 09/13/2016 at 7:22am / Germany / Transportation
Today, I'm a horse trainer and I started working with a lady's horse. After two hours of hard work and sweat, me and the horse in question are tired and I tell her I'll be back tomorrow. I get to the part where she's supposed to pay me and she says, "Oh! I thought this was free!?" FML
by Kelnyquist / 09/13/2016 at 1:37am / United States / Work
by kdriver / 09/12/2016 at 10:44am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
by mista hunna / 09/08/2016 at 1:31am / United States (Maryland) / Animals
by ripped / 09/07/2016 at 10:57am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
Today, it's my birthday and I'd planned to take my family and friends to dinner with my own money. My mom just informed me that she'd messaged everyone that I'd canceled the dinner. She instead wants to use my money to buy my older brother a gun for his birthday, which is in two days. FML
by mckenna9797 / 09/07/2016 at 7:16am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my housemate and I had rough passionate sex in every room of the house. Being that I'm 18 and he's 32, it was a new thing for me. I just received a call from my mother stating that they would not be paying for the baby they watched us make through their wireless cams in our house. FML
by BabsZilla / 09/04/2016 at 8:21pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend told me he'd drive me to the jeweler's to pick out a ring. We drove there, I picked the ring, and the sales person rang it up. I glanced at my boyfriend, only for him to reply, "Well don't look at me!" FML
by Anonymous / 09/02/2016 at 10:50am / United Kingdom (Somerset) / Love
by left alone / 08/29/2016 at 8:46am / United States (New York) / Work
Today, my dad is obsessed with making sure that I am not in any way 'bare' in front of the windows of our house. Which is surrounded by tall trees, five metres worth of tall trees. I'm not sure whether to be creeped out that someone might see me or that my dad is unhealthily obsessed about this. FML
by HellCat44 / 08/26/2016 at 5:59am / United Kingdom (Kent) / Miscellaneous
Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually lose anything. Instead, my mom drunkenly admitted to tossing my stuff away and then punishing me for it whenever she was mad at me. FML
by WellPlayedMother / 08/24/2016 at 2:15am / Miscellaneous
Today, I saw my new pet fish completely missing the food at the bottom of his tank and sucking up the little rocks instead. My last dog died from eating rocks. I think I'm doomed to have insanely stupid pets. FML
by StupidPets / 08/23/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
- Today, my best friend of 12 years told me she couldn't attend my wedding. What was so important to… Today, I ran an experiment perfectly in lab. I was the last in my class to finish and proud of how… Today, I had to work a double shift as a server with a multi-fractured foot because my boss decided…