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Aquila_Umbrae

Offline (the 07/03/2015 at 9:17pm) | Search for a member

Aquila_Umbrae

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Sacramento, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 May 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 899
  • Number of comments : 96
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About Aquila_Umbrae : I like to study people and know their stories. FML is a great place for that.

Aquila_Umbrae's page activity

Visits<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 4:05pm<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 2:07pm<b>zBLAKEz</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 8:38pm<b>trickster91420</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 4:42pm<b>kittyfrozen</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 3:59pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 8:09am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 8:57am<b>Kitcat1234</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 7:56am<b>kerbear1232</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 5:56am<b>dzhonatan</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 6:07am<b>Oatpusher</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 10:18pm<b>lovecottoncandy</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 12:03am<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:18pm<b>Michaelmore</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:02am<b>AviatOfficial</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 5:22am<b>MythicalPanda</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 4:28am<b>GingerNinja</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 1:29am<b>chinaski7628</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 12:59pm

Fucked!<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 8:07pm<b>kittyfrozen</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 9:59pm<b>kerbear1232</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 9:09am

Aquila_Umbrae's FML badges

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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

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Aquila_Umbrae's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my little brother making a Devil's trap so he could capture the demon he thinks is possessing my hamster. FML

#21287735
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32498) - you deserved it (3426)

On 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm - kids - by lexigan4 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31873) - you deserved it (18298)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, someone, and I still can't figure out who, switched my shampoo with mayonnaise. FML

#21249696
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39883) - you deserved it (3808)

On 09/01/2014 at 12:59pm - misc - by mayoshampoo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was excited to receive a rejection letter, because this was the first company to even acknowledge that I sent them a resume. FML

#21243040
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40305) - you deserved it (2746)

On 08/22/2014 at 9:14am - work - by Beeky (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks found the engagement ring I tried to give to my ex. She started crying and said yes. FML

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43360) - you deserved it (9434) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boss threw out the report I wrote for the board of directors. He said that if it were legal, he'd smash me in the balls with a brick for using Comic Sans. I had to do the whole thing again in another font with my coworkers snickering at me. FML

#21238351
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21023) - you deserved it (51223)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

#21187679
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55309) - you deserved it (18188)

On 06/25/2014 at 8:30am - kids - by failed dad (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I found out how stupid my girlfriend really is. She saw my room for the first time and started yelling at me, calling me racist, white trash for having a Confederate flag hanging on my wall. It's a British flag. FML

#21180829
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19518) - you deserved it (2170)

On 06/19/2014 at 4:04pm - misc - by EmptyGlass (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my psycho neighbor finished building a cannon. An honest-to-god, on-wheels, could-be-on-a-pirate-ship cannon. And now he's testing it in the forest by my house. I'm pretty scared for my life, to be honest. FML

#21171119
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40330) - you deserved it (4288)

On 06/11/2014 at 4:36pm - misc - by ldrik1 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41617) - you deserved it (12564)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was at work and was confronted by a customer wanting to get a "Nemo" fish. I explained that 'Nemo' needs to live in saltwater, not freshwater, like their tank was. The customer then turns around and grabs a perforated tank divider and says, "Can't I just split them up with this?" FML

#12924795
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23552) - you deserved it (3041)

On 09/05/2010 at 11:01pm - work - by christiner - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out the guy I've been dating is heavily into a mystical card game and spends all of his money going to "Magic" card conventions across the country. FML

#8153164
356 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11090) - you deserved it (24100)

On 02/12/2010 at 12:03am - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was on the webcam with my boyfriend. I could see that he was on the couch, and alone, so I took off my shirt and smiled, waiting to see his reaction. He smiled at me but then kept looking in another direction. I playfully asked "What's so distracting?" His answer: "History Channel". FML

#4896361
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42528) - you deserved it (9361)

On 08/29/2009 at 12:27am - love - by notenough (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I wanted to be creative. I hid an engagement ring for my girlfriend inside one of her running shoes. I expected her to find it and wake me up, but she didn't. Later, when I asked if there was anything in her shoe, she responded, "There was a rock. I just shook it out outside. Why?" FML

#4880927
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23028) - you deserved it (54417)

On 08/28/2009 at 11:08am - love - by fmlll (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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