Aquila_Umbrae

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Offline (the 06/23/2016 at 6:18pm)

Aquila_Umbrae

11Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Sacramento, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 May 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1930
  • Number of comments : 142
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

About Aquila_Umbrae : I like to study people and know their stories. FML is a great place for that.

Aquila_Umbrae's page activity

Visits<b>korbo7</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 2:01am<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 3:00pm<b>jocamo</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 11:55pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 8:31am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 6:33am<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 9:16am<b>Froggy_Smacks</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 10:36am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 9:12am<b>hilamonster06</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 1:17am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 7:38am<b>AHzulu</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 2:06am<b>Vkfan</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 6:41pm<b>tantanpanda</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 2:22pm<b>originalunicorn</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 10:59am<b>chinaski7628</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 4:47pm<b>balboa_2</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 11:55pm<b>AQueenOfDeath</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 6:09pm<b>kyiomi</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 6:40pm

Fucked!<b>hilamonster06</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 7:17am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 1:24pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 5:08am<b>AQueenOfDeath</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 12:09am<b>kyiomi</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 12:40am<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 3:53am<b>Kristyanne</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 10:15am<b>Naatya_</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 9:41pm<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 8:07pm<b>kittyfrozen</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 9:59pm<b>kerbear1232</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 9:09am

Aquila_Umbrae's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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Aquila_Umbrae's favorite FMLs

Today, I noticed a customer looking for expired products in hopes of receiving a coupon from my store. I told them to let me know if they found anything. They promptly began following me around, telling me how to do my job, only to later file a complaint saying that I was harassing them. FML

by itsdezzz / 03/09/2016 at 6:43pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, a shifty customer came in to my store and was hanging around for about 30 minutes. Apparently, he took that time to put religiously-motivated anti-abortion notes into each and every pair of socks. In the following hours, I had 17 angry returns and was personally threatened twice. FML

by socknotes / 03/08/2016 at 11:02pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Work

Today, an old man wanted to return a fryer. The box had blood smears all over it, so I told him no. He became irate and demanded a manager. Management said, "Hell no and don't touch that box." When I came back, he was licking a paper towel and attempting to wipe off the blood. FML

by leafynitemare / 03/08/2016 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband jokingly said to me, "I think you love Captain Kirk more than me." Without thinking, I said in a serious tone, "I think I do, too." FML

by trekkiewife / 10/20/2015 at 3:45pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I had to grab a large kitchen knife from my son, after I heard him convince his friend to join him in cutting off his finger, so they could "be assassins like Ezio." FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2015 at 10:29am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whisky, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML

by Angus / 09/17/2015 at 3:48pm / France / Kids

Today, I had to explain to my dad how I rear-ended the car in front of me because of a particularly intense banjo solo. FML

by mumfordandsonimdisappointed / 08/29/2015 at 1:09am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to upgrade to Windows 10. I wanted to keep my old files on the current hard drive, I clicked on the keep old files option. Thanks to Windows, I lost everything. FML

by Arrkyna / 08/23/2015 at 1:42pm / Miscellaneous

Today, in the second week of August, hell has come to earth; my mom has been playing Christmas music all afternoon and is already searching online for decorations. I hope she buys a length of rope to go with them, because I've already given up on life. FML

by brbkillingmyself / 08/08/2015 at 6:52pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I fed my 4ft python a live rat for the first time. He now has a new friend he won't let me near. FML

by clutzirella / 08/07/2015 at 2:32am / United States (Florida) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I noticed my fish was still hungry after feeding him earlier. I figured, "Eh, a little bit more won't kill him". I was wrong. FML

by liishax3 / 11/22/2014 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I walked in on my little brother making a Devil's trap so he could capture the demon he thinks is possessing my hamster. FML

by lexigan4 / 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Animals

Today, someone, and I still can't figure out who, switched my shampoo with mayonnaise. FML

by mayoshampoo / 09/01/2014 at 12:59pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was excited to receive a rejection letter, because this was the first company to even acknowledge that I sent them a resume. FML

by Beeky / 08/22/2014 at 9:14am / United States (Montana) / Work