Applejack87

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Applejack87

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 April 1987 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4741
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Applejack87's page activity

Visits<b>miketofte</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 9:17am<b>Undecided_Jesus</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 8:25am<b>Wonder_Woman257</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 12:43pm<b>kciles</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 6:52pm<b>James_is_Mexican</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 6:13pm<b>ciscokid44</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 5:52pm<b>zachjusyeaa</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 1:54pm<b>K_kanaka</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 12:39am<b>grogers311</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 8:49am<b>mlabar</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 12:18pm<b>camjarvis44</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 11:59pm<b>minutepoet</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 12:13am<b>Kain713</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 12:12pm<b>spencer314314</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 8:58pm<b>table2014</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 7:05pm<b>separatefive3</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 6:59pm<b>toneeangel</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 6:02pm<b>chargers2588</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 2:14pm

Applejack87's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Applejack87's badges

Applejack87's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I assumed since we live together that he meant marriage. I was wrong; the next level is me jacking him off with my feet. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2014 at 12:29pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was back home from work drinking coffee when I heard someone open the door with a key. It was my boyfriend, who obviously didn't expect to see me home. We don't live together, and I never gave him a key. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2014 at 4:59am / Russian Federation (Lipetsk) / Love

Today, I had to explain to my husband why saving the condom from the first time we had sex is not romantic. FML

by O_o / 02/08/2014 at 7:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, the guy I was sexting asked me to stop including my face in the pictures. FML

by khfhjfsb / 02/04/2014 at 7:41pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was packing, when my parents told me to put my little sister's toothbrush in the top pocket of their suitcase. The pocket I opened had 3 unopened boxes of condoms in it. We're going to my gran's house, and I'm going to be sleeping on a mattress on the floor of their room. FML

by Anonymous / 01/26/2014 at 12:10am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2014 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my first ever job interview. I thought I was doing well, until the recruiter asked why he should hire me. The only thing I could say was "Because I'm really, really nervous right now?" FML

by bebooneo / 01/23/2014 at 5:16pm / United States (Texas) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, as if having to endure the noises of my parents having sex in the next room wasn't painful enough, my mom decided to shout, "Yeah! Like a horse!" I want to cry. FML

by DisturbedMan / 01/15/2014 at 5:29pm / United Kingdom (Kent) / Intimacy

Today, like every day since my wife was prescribed antibiotics for an infection, I had to hide one of the pills inside her food, because she'd apparently rather fall seriously ill than swallow them like an adult. FML

by Anonymous / 01/09/2014 at 2:02pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 1:22pm / United States (Alabama) / Work

Today, my strict Christian mother walked into my room just after I'd finished masturbating. Although dressed, I was still holding the used tissue, which she noticed. Having to think fast to disguise my deed and avoid an entire sermon, I had no option but to blow my nose with the spunky tissue. FML

by Jizzyface / 12/29/2013 at 7:36am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Intimacy

Today, my class was interrupted by flowers, balloons and chocolates. Then he sang to me a song he wrote himself. This was all for our one-year anniversary. It probably would have been the best day of my life... if I knew who he was. FML

by romance sucks. / 12/18/2013 at 4:20pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, my girlfriend refused to take a picture with me to prove to my friends that I do indeed have a girlfriend. I got so desperate that I photoshopped myself into one of her Facebook photos instead. FML

by Wow. / 12/18/2013 at 1:23pm / United States / Love

Today, while at the gym, I noticed a creepy-looking guy watching me. When I got up from the equipment, I noticed that he sniffed the seat. I didn't say anything the first time. After he did it the second time, I asked him to stop. He bent down and sniffed it without breaking eye contact. FML

by gymgirl / 12/17/2013 at 6:48pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML

by Sherressa / 12/02/2013 at 3:04pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous