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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
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Today, suffering from severe morning sickness followed by cravings for salty food, I had stacked our fridge with yummy snacks. When finally emerging from our bathroom after retching this morning, I found out my husband had eaten all my snacks the night before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27324) - you deserved it (2962)
On 04/02/2013 at 11:04am - health - by moosemay (woman) - Germany (Bayern)
Today, I came home in tears over finding out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. I told my seemingly sympathetic dad everything. His advice was to lure them both to our house with the promise of a three-way, after which he'd "kill the shit" out of them. Real mature, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28106) - you deserved it (4377)
On 03/31/2013 at 1:55pm - love - by immaturity all around (woman) - United States
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She didn't say no, she didn't faint, and she didn't cry. She just stared at me blankly and said, "But... why...?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (36682) - you deserved it (2349) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 03/29/2013 at 9:29pm - love - by Badam - France (Aquitaine)
Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36278) - you deserved it (2252)
On 03/23/2013 at 9:25am - kids - by kindergarten teacher - United States (California)
Today, I had to endure a long face-to-face conversation with a coworker who had fierce BO. He had his fingers interlaced around the back of his head the whole time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25022) - you deserved it (2075)
On 03/22/2013 at 11:01am - work - by stankness - United States
Today, I figured I needed to clean my room. I ended up finding my $135 calculator that I'd accused my ex-boyfriend of selling for gas money. That's also the reason I dumped him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6482) - you deserved it (50624)
On 03/11/2013 at 2:56pm - money - by supertango500 (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend told me I was selfish for "choosing" to start my period on his day off from work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40426) - you deserved it (3921)
On 03/04/2013 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by Thankshun (woman) - United States
Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30428) - you deserved it (2127)
On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28204) - you deserved it (6233)
On 02/17/2013 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Notaplacetogo (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29512) - you deserved it (2562)
On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States
Today, my son sprayed Axe body-spray all over the house in the vain hope of covering up the scent of the joints he'd been smoking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21337) - you deserved it (3352)
On 01/07/2013 at 3:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my partner was inspired by 50 Shades Of Grey to try making me orgasm with a full bladder, therefore intensifying the experience. He was right, it was mind blowing. It also made me piss the bed for the first time in twenty-odd years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24835) - you deserved it (4788)
On 01/07/2013 at 8:01am - intimacy - by wetsheets (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)
Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44695) - you deserved it (7276)
On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19359) - you deserved it (4300)
On 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan)
Today, my dad got a warning from our ISP for going well over their fair usage limit. I barely use our wifi, and I keep telling him he should password-protect our router to stop people leeching our Internet. He's blaming me anyway, and says I'm grounded until January. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17715) - you deserved it (1225)
On 12/07/2012 at 4:49pm - misc - by WPA2 OR DEATH (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 20 May 2013
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