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ApacheC424

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ApacheC424
  • Town/Country : Brampton, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 February 1994 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 925
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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ApacheC424's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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ApacheC424's favorite FMLs

Today, I was kicked out of class for having a coughing fit. Yesterday, I was kicked out of class for sleeping, a side effect of my cough suppressant. Three absents from this class and I automatically fail. FML

Today, I missed my own surprise party because, having heard it being planned, I though it was going to be an intervention. FML

#13328394
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5515) - you deserved it (34078)

On 10/05/2010 at 10:36am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend road head. He closed his eyes when he came, and crashed into a pole. I have whiplash, and a very very angry father. FML

#13321339
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7400) - you deserved it (40726)

On 10/04/2010 at 8:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I missed my history exam because they'd changed the day. Apparently they sent out an email to let everyone know. Too bad I'd banned myself from the internet in order to study for the exam. FML

#13314602
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27681) - you deserved it (8458)

On 10/04/2010 at 7:22am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I married the woman I love. I wasn't the groom, I was the minister. FML

#13285940
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61125) - you deserved it (5803)

On 10/02/2010 at 4:07am - love - by Pr unlucky - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my four-year-old asked me when I was going to die. I replied "Not for a long time, why?" He looked at me and stated "Because I only want to live with Daddy." FML

#13284441
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37867) - you deserved it (4070)

On 10/02/2010 at 1:07am - kids - by notsoonenufdeparted - United States (California)

Today, I found out my older brother put tanning lotion in the lotion I use to masturbate with. Now I have orange palms and an orange penis which won't go away for weeks. FML

#13278835
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16548) - you deserved it (40051)

On 10/01/2010 at 6:12pm - intimacy - by caughtorangehanded (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

#12822018
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37603) - you deserved it (14404)

On 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by FYouBoyfriend (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

#12822018
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37603) - you deserved it (14404)

On 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by FYouBoyfriend (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight. Doubting our relationship, I asked him seriously if he loved me. He looked thoughtful, gathered me in his arms and said, "If I say yes, will you be less pissed?" and then tried to stick his hand down my pants. FML

Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML

#10433872
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34659) - you deserved it (9198)

On 05/09/2010 at 10:20am - intimacy - by imustbegay - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to take my bra off during sex. My breasts had "deflated" somewhat due to weight loss and I was really self-conscious about them, but my boyfriend insisted I was hot no matter what. When the bra came off, the dick got soft. FML

#8793926
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27628) - you deserved it (3260)

On 03/03/2010 at 4:24am - intimacy - by victoriassecret - United States

Today, I was making schnitzel at our kitchen so I had to get rid of all the oil. So I decided it would be best to put the hot pan on our porch so the oil would cool down and then I could get rid of it. Unfortunately the ground is sealed with tar, so the tar melted and now the pan is stuck to the ground. FML

#8583652
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6619) - you deserved it (23596)

On 02/23/2010 at 7:54am - health - by peterpan (man) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, I was spacing out in French class and randomly got an erection. My professor called on me to stand up at the front of the room and say, "I am wearing a belt," in French. Not everyone was observing just my belt. FML

#7782514
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28890) - you deserved it (5273)

On 02/01/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by boner (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML

#7609277
331 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34938) - you deserved it (9141)

On 01/27/2010 at 8:35am - intimacy - by chanclepants - Sent from mobile version



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